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Author Topic: MAKE YOUR CASE - Discussion of marriage age allowed?  (Read 3129 times)

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Offline Gray2023

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Re: MAKE YOUR CASE - Discussion of marriage age allowed?
« Reply #75 on: May 18, 2025, 01:12:10 PM »
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  • Fun fact -- the first person to throw the word "Feminist!" in that thread was *drumroll* -- a female.
    But you assumed that was a man. I certainly did! But the moderator can see the identity behind ALL Anonymous posts.

    And since that was one of the opening shots in this "war", I felt that should be made known.
    I think women are harder on their own sex, so that makes sense.
    1 Corinthians: Chapter 13 "4 Charity is patient, is kind: charity envieth not, dealeth not perversely; is not puffed up; 5 Is not ambitious, seeketh not her own, is not provoked to anger, thinketh no evil;"

    Offline Seraphina

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    Re: MAKE YOUR CASE - Discussion of marriage age allowed?
    « Reply #76 on: May 18, 2025, 01:14:09 PM »
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  • In fact, I've specifically seen several (non-Catholic) men come to this precise conclusion. They decide their only shot is to find a woman young enough before she enters college, etc. They feel that is their only hope. And strictly speaking they are correct. They're not talking about Trads remember. These poor men don't even have the Faith to strengthen and console them. How many non-Catholic women are virgins at 20? So few as to be ignorable.
    Judging by when I graduated high school in 1977, I’ll guess 2/3 to 3/4 of the girls were virgins.  Now?  


    Offline forlorn

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    Re: MAKE YOUR CASE - Discussion of marriage age allowed?
    « Reply #77 on: May 18, 2025, 01:17:48 PM »
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  • I don't know why women haven't figured out the desire for a younger wife is probably linked to the desire to marry a virgin.  Men can't be certain of that with women in their 20s anymore.
    This makes sense, but it correlates much more strongly with religion than age. The stats I've seen are that the average person loses their virginity at around 17. So sure, if you want to marry a secular woman with no faith, then you have to marry early - but such a woman won't want to marry early anyway - whereas someone raised in traditional Catholicism, who has never married, is much more likely to be a virgin no matter their age.

    These are all reasonable considerations - younger women are more likely to be virgins, they're are less likely to be career obsessed, they're more likely to give birth without complications, they're generally prettier - but all these things are only correlations. A traditional Catholic blessed with good looks will be more pure at 28 than a Novus Ordo Catholic at 18, nevermind atheists or protestants.

    As for looks - I understand why 40 year old doctors often prefer 25 year old nurses to female doctors their own age, and there is a big difference in physical attractiveness there. But I don't understand how that extends to teenagers. Ladies in their early 20s are still at their peak in terms of beauty and fertility. This peak period may start at ~16 but it doesn't end then. Within that span, one's natural good (or bad) looks determine one's attractiveness much more than one's age.

    Offline Gray2023

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    Re: MAKE YOUR CASE - Discussion of marriage age allowed?
    « Reply #78 on: May 18, 2025, 01:43:04 PM »
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  • Oh I agree, there are plenty of teen girls I wouldn't consider marrying for whatever reason.

    I think the real issue is that many trads are very strongly against an age gap because of feminist tendencies. That's why there was such a visceral reaction in the other thread.
    The visceral reaction had nothing to do with feminism and everything to do with a mama bears protection of her daughters in that age range. 

    So AnthonyPadua, please stop bringing up feminism. We are woman that have been formed by the society we live in. We are trying to become good Catholics. We are not becoming feminists, nor encouraging other women to do so, if it appears that way then there is a misunderstanding., or we are truly not Catholic. Period. End. Of. Story.
    1 Corinthians: Chapter 13 "4 Charity is patient, is kind: charity envieth not, dealeth not perversely; is not puffed up; 5 Is not ambitious, seeketh not her own, is not provoked to anger, thinketh no evil;"

    Offline WorldsAway

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    Re: MAKE YOUR CASE - Discussion of marriage age allowed?
    « Reply #79 on: May 18, 2025, 02:21:19 PM »
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  • We are woman that have been formed by the society we live in. 
    Well said
    If you had been of the world, the world would love its own: but because you are not of the world, but I have chosen you out of the world, therefore the world hateth you [John 15:108


    Offline Peter Alcantara

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    Re: MAKE YOUR CASE - Discussion of marriage age allowed?
    « Reply #80 on: May 18, 2025, 02:22:23 PM »
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  • The visceral reaction had nothing to do with feminism and everything to do with a mama bears protection of her daughters in that age range.

    So AnthonyPadua, please stop bringing up feminism. We are woman that have been formed by the society we live in. We are trying to become good Catholics. We are not becoming feminists, nor encouraging other women to do so, if it appears that way then there is a misunderstanding., or we are truly not Catholic. Period. End. Of. Story.
    Well articulated. The audience was overlooked, civility abandoned, and reprehensible language employed. In light of the events that transpired in that thread, such a response is entirely predictable from any parent seeking to safeguard their children.


    Offline Peter Alcantara

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    Re: MAKE YOUR CASE - Discussion of marriage age allowed?
    « Reply #81 on: May 18, 2025, 02:29:16 PM »
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  • My last post on this topic is simply a quote from Jean-Baptiste Chautaurd, O.C., S.O.

    It is his definition of the interior life, 
    " Thus I can define it as the state of a soul which strives against its natural inclinations in order to REGULATE them, and endeavors to acquire the HABIT of judging and directing its movements IN ALL THINGS according to the light of the Gospel and the example of Our Lord."

    Offline 2Vermont

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    Re: MAKE YOUR CASE - Discussion of marriage age allowed?
    « Reply #82 on: May 18, 2025, 02:52:05 PM »
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  • The visceral reaction had nothing to do with feminism and everything to do with a mama bears protection of her daughters in that age range.

    I agree that this was more likely the reason for those women who are married with children/daughters.


    Offline TheRealMcCoy

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    Re: MAKE YOUR CASE - Discussion of marriage age allowed?
    « Reply #83 on: May 18, 2025, 02:58:06 PM »
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  • Then women who have no daughters should not be commenting on this topic.

    Offline 2Vermont

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    Re: MAKE YOUR CASE - Discussion of marriage age allowed?
    « Reply #84 on: May 18, 2025, 02:59:32 PM »
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  • Then women who have no daughters should not be commenting on this topic.
    I am married with no children. Why shouldn't I be able to comment?  No one should be barred. 

    Offline MaterDominici

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    Re: MAKE YOUR CASE - Discussion of marriage age allowed?
    « Reply #85 on: May 18, 2025, 03:18:41 PM »
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  • The visceral reaction had nothing to do with feminism and everything to do with a mama bears protection of her daughters in that age range.
    Nonsense. Far better to "protect" your daughters by being well-informed of reality than by hurling random insults and running away. I also disagree that they needed any protection at all from this discussion. And, how many of those so offended actually have teen daughters? Not many I suspect. It's perhaps more likely that they have single daughters in their mid-20s, but I don't really believe that's true either.


    Offline Gray2023

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    Re: MAKE YOUR CASE - Discussion of marriage age allowed?
    « Reply #86 on: May 18, 2025, 03:23:15 PM »
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  • Then women who have no daughters should not be commenting on this topic.
    Do you have daughters?

    All women were daughters at one point in their life.  I am Godmother to three girls.  My friends talk about raising daughters.  I have had teenage daughters help me with my young children.

    I am not sure what your gripe is with me, but maybe we should have a personal conversation, instead of you airing it out in a public forum.

    1 Corinthians: Chapter 13 "4 Charity is patient, is kind: charity envieth not, dealeth not perversely; is not puffed up; 5 Is not ambitious, seeketh not her own, is not provoked to anger, thinketh no evil;"

    Offline 2Vermont

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    Re: MAKE YOUR CASE - Discussion of marriage age allowed?
    « Reply #87 on: May 18, 2025, 03:31:59 PM »
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  • Nonsense. Far better to "protect" your daughters by being well-informed of reality than by hurling random insults and running away. I also disagree that they needed any protection at all from this discussion. And, how many of those so offended actually have teen daughters? Not many I suspect. It's perhaps more likely that they have single daughters in their mid-20s, but I don't really believe that's true either.
    I don't think the age of someone's daughter should matter.  I would imagine that mothers of young daughters can also have such a reaction; however, I also think that having a daughter was only one reason for some of the reactions. I think other things were at play.

    Offline Matthew

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    Re: MAKE YOUR CASE - Discussion of marriage age allowed?
    « Reply #88 on: May 18, 2025, 03:33:06 PM »
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  • Judging by when I graduated high school in 1977, I’ll guess 2/3 to 3/4 of the girls were virgins.  Now? 

    Are you suggesting that the world is basically the same as it was in 1977? I hope not!

    A lot of things have gone downhill since then. I dare say that is common sense.

    Just for starters, there were no smartphones, tiktok, online dating (and hookups) and just like porn, fornication was much harder to come by and had to be more "intentional", a.k.a. you had to put in more effort in and work for it. Not saying some people didn't put in the effort, but these vices weren't as difficult to avoid as they are today.

    Last but not least, the actual statistics for marriages, sex habits, etc. bear out my assertion that virginity is at an all time low, for all age groups and demographics.
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    Offline MaterDominici

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    Re: MAKE YOUR CASE - Discussion of marriage age allowed?
    « Reply #89 on: May 18, 2025, 03:49:27 PM »
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  • I don't think the age of someone's daughter should matter. 
    Agreed, but I don't like the attempt to excuse the hysteria on "protecting their daughters in that age range" when most of them don't actually have any.
    Quote
    I think other things were at play.
    Me too.