Author Topic: Long Term Marriages (Read 3453 times)

Marlelar · « **Reply #5 on:** November 09, 2013, 03:14:46 PM »

Quote from: Matthew

Quote
two children, five grandchildren and two great-great grandchildren

This isn't a very impressive family tree. They apparently were ahead of their time when it comes to de-prioritizing children.

How do you know there were not "technical difficulties"? She might have had EIGHT miscarriages, or diseased organs which made it impossible for her to have more. Perhaps he had erectile dysfunction or low sperm count and they were lucky to even get two.

Don't assume that just because someone has a small family by your personal definition that they didn't want more, it is an injustice.

Marsha

poche · « **Reply #6 on:** November 09, 2013, 10:44:28 PM »

Quote from: Matthew

Quote
two children, five grandchildren and two great-great grandchildren

First of all, I assuming they meant "two great grandchildren" since they didn't mention any in that generation (if they had 0 great-grandchildren, they'd never have any great-great-grandchildren!)

This isn't a very impressive family tree. They apparently were ahead of their time when it comes to de-prioritizing children.

My wife's grandmother (R.I.P.) was about their age (she died in her mid-nineties) and she had EIGHT CHILDREN. As you know, it's more work to have 8 children than 8 grandchildren. If you had just 3 children, you could easily end up with 8 grandchildren, and just as easily end up with 16 great-grandchildren. See the pattern?

So they had TWO children -- back when my grandparents had their 8 children, my other grandparents had their 5 children, and my wife's grandparents had their 8 children...it was still normal back then to have a "natural family size".

At the very least, I would hesitate to hold up this couple as some kind of model.

It looks like this couple was about 70 years ahead of their time! Most couples today opt for precisely 2 children, sometimes spilling over to 3 (if, for example, they end up with 2 girls and the dad wanted a son)

And for those of you wondering why I'm assuming bad things about this couple -- I note that their two children followed in their parents' footsteps. If the couple in the story constantly lamented their infertility (note: why didn't they adopt? I'm sure it was a heck of a lot easier back in the 30's and 40's) and taught their children well how precious little lives are, I'm sure their children would have had more than a below-average amount. (Note: their kids' generation -- Baby Boomers -- averaged 3-4 children.)

Let's put it this way -- I know a family where the father & mother couldn't have as many children as they wanted -- but they did a good job teaching their children how valuable babies are. Even though they only have 2 married (and thus "producing") children, they're already up to 11 grandchildren!

I don't think it is fair to rush to judgement about the number of children. There is a thread in cite.catholique where the couple has one child. They want more but they are medically unable. There is a strong temptation to use IVF, which is not approved by the Catholic Church. She was asking prayers of the people for them to make the right decision. She wrote that the temptation for them to do the wrong thing is very strong.

Capt McQuigg · « **Reply #7 on:** November 13, 2013, 01:58:18 PM »

Matthew is right on!

My grandmother on my mother's side had 13 children.

My grandmother on my father's side had 8 children.

Both sets of grandparents had over 40 grandchildren.

What kind of families are you trying to highlight, Poche?

Poche, they may say different things but the end result of the novus ordo and planned parenthood is the same. That result is smaller families.

Capt McQuigg · « **Reply #8 on:** November 13, 2013, 01:59:59 PM »

Quote from: Marlelar

Quote from: Matthew
Quote
two children, five grandchildren and two great-great grandchildren

This isn't a very impressive family tree. They apparently were ahead of their time when it comes to de-prioritizing children.

How do you know there were not "technical difficulties"? She might have had EIGHT miscarriages, or diseased organs which made it impossible for her to have more. Perhaps he had erectile dysfunction or low sperm count and they were lucky to even get two.

Don't assume that just because someone has a small family by your personal definition that they didn't want more, it is an injustice.

Marsha

And the kids had the very same problems?

It really brings to mind the comment one of the sedevacantist bishops once said. At your average novus ordo church, the normal family size is two kids. Imagine that? Every couple has fertility problems.

poche · « **Reply #9 on:** November 13, 2013, 10:47:04 PM »

Quote from: Capt McQuigg

Matthew is right on!

My grandmother on my mother's side had 13 children.

My grandmother on my father's side had 8 children.

Both sets of grandparents had over 40 grandchildren.

What kind of families are you trying to highlight, Poche?

Poche, they may say different things but the end result of the novus ordo and planned parenthood is the same. That result is smaller families.

I am trying to highlight long term marriages. I think it is wise for us to look at those couples who have been married to each other for long periods of time and see what we could learn from them. By the way long term marriage and planned parent contraceptive mentality don't go together.