Long-time teacher here! If at all possible, homeschool your children. Consult with other homeschoolers and observe, teach a lesson or two while your children are still young. Go as a couple if possible. If need be, leave the baby with Grandma or a highly trusted sitter. Investigate many different styles, curriculums. Not every style or curriculum suits every child and family. You may choose different materials and methods for your children because even within families, the strengths, weaknesses, interests, temperaments, needs will be different. It’s good to have seen different models before you and mostly your wife’s time and energy will be taken up with infants and toddlers!
It’s best to observe in person, but these days, you can do it over Zoom or a similar platform. Which brings up the issue of technology. What will you use? To what degree? Under which circuмstances? While some trad families use no technology in homeschooling, but I think that approach will render your children incapable of becoming gainfully employed as an adult, unless you plan to live in an off-grid community like the most conservative of the Amish. So far as I know, there are no traditional Catholic communities, although attempts have been made. They unfortunately met with failure within a few years. Manual labor jobs are fewer than ever, don’t pay well enough for most to merely exist, and may well be virtually gone by the time your children need employment. Nonetheless, do teach your children (and yourselves, if need be) to do manual labor. Grow a garden, work on a car, build from wood, operate and fix appliances, have a basic knowledge of things like plumbing, electric, how technology works. Know how to clean a house, do simple clothing repairs, cook a decent meal. Children need to perform household and yard work and do so as their regular responsibility from as soon as they are able. No matter if their best starts out less than perfect! Instill a positive attitude about doing their part to keep the family running smoothly. Do not permit grumbling. If you don’t like a particular chore, so what? You’re entitled to your opinion, but that’s not why you do or don’t do it!
(As a teacher, when children complained or shirked their classroom chores, I took the time to remind them why they needed to do it, and with a calm demeanor. As an illustration, I told them that my apartment and building did not have laundry facilities. It was too old. I had to go to the laundromat and I really dislike laundromats! Detergent smell makes me sneeze, stuffs up my sinuses, not air conditioned, in summer beastly hot, lots of flies, usually unruly children running amuck, racing in laundry carts, blaring TVs with bad shows, filthy magazines, not enough chairs for customers, machines that break down in the middle of washing your clothes, grumpy attendants who run out of change, weird people, etc. How about I just quit washing my clothes and linens? After a month, wouldn’t you like to sit in the special seat attached to my desk? Why not? If they don’t get the message, I tell them it’s a waste of time showering, brushing my teeth, washing and combing my hair. Now, would you like the star seat? 🫢)
IMO, children should not receive money, ie. Allowance, for routine tasks. If they undertake an exceptional and arduous task, a little cash or other age-appropriate award is in order for the child or children who did it only. No participation trophies! It gives the wrong message and leaves them ill-prepared for adult life.
Teach your boys to be masculine, your girls to be feminine.
I cannot answer all your questions, but I will comment on #1 regarding 18-22 year old cradletrad girls trained at St. Mary’s. If they are teaching in a small school comprised of students like themselves, it’s probably okay for most students. However, they should not teach special needs children or those who may have emotional, social problems, or who have been exposed to the world outside of the tradcat cocoon. No fault of their own, but I’ve seen these nice young ladies make matters worse, even dangerous for children, and the teachers who are mostly just waiting out until they’re married, come to dislike children! I’ve personally witnessed one such lady of 20 be unable to control a grades 4/5 class of six, two girls, four boys. The following year, only two returned. The two sets of parents returned their children to public school and one to a diocesan Catholic school where all four were compelled to repeat the grade. Two of the teachers were excellent, a retired grandfather who taught high school Latin, Science, and History. The other was a woman of 58 whose husband had jumped ship. She’d successfully raised and homeschooled five children until high school while holding down a full time job as a court stenographer. A younger sister living next door had helped her out. She taught 4 Kindergartners, 3 first graders, 1 second grader, and 1 third grader with mild Down Syndrome. Two among the others came from dysfunctional, broken homes, too well exposed to the world, behavioral issues. She taught everything except music and p.e. She did a terrific job. Maturity, age, and ability to navigate the world while remaining Catholic make a huge difference.
If you do decide to send a child to a Catholic school, you need to check it out very carefully for exactly the issues you raise. In general, if the teachers are vowed religious with professional study, like, a degree, not just two year’s training in one curriculum, preferably single sex classes after fifth or sixth grades, the children will be better off. Use extreme caution if you consider boarding school, and certainly do not send a timid, easily influenced, or child not well grounded in his faith, or a child who is younger than 12 or immature. I know there have been problems of a serious nature (mortal sin) in several SSPX schools in the US. Since many of your specific beliefs are opposite of the SSPX, if you do use their school, let it be only in the primary grades, K-2 or even grade 1 if you do not want your child to receive preparation for Confession and Communion. Kindergarteners and first graders aren’t going to be concerned with BOD, Sedevacantism, etc. Of course, if you belief Mass that mentions Francis is definitely invalid, you’ll not want your child to ever attend an SSPX school. These days, it’s far better to homeschool, imo, even though my entire life has been dedicated to teaching!
I do take issue that your children will be “socially retarded” if you don’t involve them in outside social activities. The entire idea that children must be “socialized” from an early age is based in the socialist-communist ideas of Dewey which he adopted after observing extensively, the schools in the USSR! If your children accompany you on excursions to town, the store, the doctor, dentist, the motor vehicle bureau, post office, realtor…If you take trips to museums, the zoo, aquarium, charity sporting events, they will have ample opportunity to interact with others by your example. Perhaps when around 12 and up, consider joining a small, family oriented sports league after you’ve checked it out. At least parent should be present for the game or activity until about age 15. Hopefully, by then, your child should have seen you handle confrontational people, those engaged in immoral attire, conduct, or promulgation of wrong beliefs and be able to handle it him or herself. I taught my students the best policy for a child, is to “Turn. Pray. Get Away!” If you felt threatened, disturbed, or the person was a much older child or an adult, inform a trusted adult, like parent, teacher, immediately.
Best of Our Lord’s blessing for a happy marriage and all the little ones He desires you to raise for Heaven!
Topic: Homeschooling Advice (Read 6374 times)