Let's first start learning from the patron saint of parish priests.
St. John Vianney said we should try to be relatively silent in the hours before we go to Mass, and after Mass go home in silence.
If we all try to follow this, all the abuses and complaints should be rare.
I must add, however, that today's Mass centers most often have some people who travel very far to get there. A chapel should have a select group, chosen by the priest, who form an apostolate to give some friendly attention to such people, because they are often isolated from Catholics at home, and since they travel far, need a break before heading out on the road again after Mass.
The saints advice is very wise. I focus exclusively on prayer at Mass. More and more I'm realizing that anything that is not of spiritual benefit is of actual detriment. I don't want to be involved in any distractions or nonsense...
In general, the popular movement for the TLM is way too impassioned about politics and less so about interior conversion.
You're showing your hand here.
If you focus strictly on your own interior prayer life, why do you think you are so aware of the interior condition of your fellow parishioners?
As for my other question, let me just ask if you go to an Indult (i.e, diocesan or FSSP/ICCRS) or Trad (SSPX/SSPV/CMRI) - this is a very general question and isn't really personal.