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Author Topic: I need help  (Read 3725 times)

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Offline solitary Man

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I need help
« on: December 03, 2023, 10:21:38 AM »
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    • I need help

    I feel alone without help
    ok first I know that divorce is not good! but in my case it was necessary
    I am a son and when my parents started to separate it was a relief for me because my father was emotionally abusive!
    their marriage has a high chance of being null and void!
    my mother suffered from my father and yet some people criticized her for asking for a divorce, and yet my father was never criticized!
    I can't find support anywhere, when Catholics comment on this subject they only talk about how bad divorce is, etc., I've seen some people say to people in a similar situation to mine, this phrase "get over it, because it's in health and illness"
    Sorry if I said the wrong thing!
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    Offline Gray2023

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    Re: I need help
    « Reply #1 on: December 03, 2023, 01:15:49 PM »
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    • Quote from: solitary Man on December 03, 2023, 10:21:38 AM
    I need help

    I feel alone without help
    ok first I know that divorce is not good! but in my case it was necessary
    I am a son and when my parents started to separate it was a relief for me because my father was emotionally abusive!
    their marriage has a high chance of being null and void!
    my mother suffered from my father and yet some people criticized her for asking for a divorce, and yet my father was never criticized!
    I can't find support anywhere, when Catholics comment on this subject they only talk about how bad divorce is, etc., I've seen some people say to people in a similar situation to mine, this phrase "get over it, because it's in health and illness"
    Sorry if I said the wrong thing!
    It seems you are looking for some good support.  Can you introduce yourself, so we are better equipped to help? In General Topic there is an introduction feed.
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    1 Corinthians: Chapter 13 "4 Charity is patient, is kind: charity envieth not, dealeth not perversely; is not puffed up; 5 Is not ambitious, seeketh not her own, is not provoked to anger, thinketh no evil;"

    Offline AMDGJMJ

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    Re: I need help
    « Reply #2 on: December 03, 2023, 05:03:42 PM »
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    • Quote from: solitary Man on December 03, 2023, 10:21:38 AM
    I need help

    I feel alone without help
    ok first I know that divorce is not good! but in my case it was necessary
    I am a son and when my parents started to separate it was a relief for me because my father was emotionally abusive!
    their marriage has a high chance of being null and void!
    my mother suffered from my father and yet some people criticized her for asking for a divorce, and yet my father was never criticized!
    I can't find support anywhere, when Catholics comment on this subject they only talk about how bad divorce is, etc., I've seen some people say to people in a similar situation to mine, this phrase "get over it, because it's in health and illness"
    Sorry if I said the wrong thing!
    :pray::pray::pray:
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    "Jesus, Meek and Humble of Heart, make my heart like unto Thine!"

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    Online Miseremini

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    Re: I need help
    « Reply #3 on: December 03, 2023, 05:41:21 PM »
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    • DIVORCE:  Render to Caesar what belongs to Caesar and to God what belongs to God.

    For a Catholic, divorce belongs strictly to the Government, full stop, period.

    If they were validly married by a  Catholic priest they are still married albeit separated (living apart) which the Church allows for a number of reasons.

    If they were NOT validly married, they were living in sin and it's good they've separated and both are free to go their separate ways.

    Regardless of what happened and how it happened it's not something that anyone (relatives/friends) should be criticizing her for as it's NONE OF THEIR BUSINESS.
    In the last 15 years people have gotten the notion they have a right to express their opinion on every little thing they see or hear about.  As Our Lord said, "what concern of it is yours?"

    Try not to discuss it in person beyond the individuals involved.
    You and your Mom can support each other.


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    "Let God arise, and let His enemies be scattered: and them that hate Him flee from before His Holy Face"  Psalm 67:2[/b]

    Online Persto

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    Re: I need help
    « Reply #4 on: December 03, 2023, 08:56:13 PM »
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    • :pray:
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    Persevere...
    Fear not, nor be any way discouraged- Duet.1:21

    Offline Quo vadis Domine

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    Re: I need help
    « Reply #5 on: December 10, 2023, 05:39:02 AM »
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    • Why is there a good chance for your parents marriage to be invalid?
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    For what doth it profit a man, if he gain the whole world, and suffer the loss of his own soul? Or what exchange shall a man give for his soul?

    Offline Yeti

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    Re: I need help
    « Reply #6 on: December 10, 2023, 07:56:29 AM »
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    • Quote from: Miseremini on December 03, 2023, 05:41:21 PM
    DIVORCE:  Render to Caesar what belongs to Caesar and to God what belongs to God.

    For a Catholic, divorce belongs strictly to the Government, full stop, period.


    .

    False. This is actually a condemned proposition in the Syllabus of Errors:

    Quote
    67. By the law of nature, the marriage tie is not indissoluble, and in many cases divorce properly so called may be decreed by the civil authority. [CONDEMNED] — Ibid.; Allocution “Acerbis"



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    Miseremini:
    Regardless of what happened and how it happened it's not something that anyone (relatives/friends) should be criticizing her for as it's NONE OF THEIR BUSINESS.
    In the last 15 years people have gotten the notion they have a right to express their opinion on every little thing they see or hear about.  As Our Lord said, "what concern of it is yours?"

    People have a right and duty to condemn public scandal. Our Lord never said what your fake quote says.


    Quote
    Try not to discuss it in person beyond the individuals involved.
    You and your Mom can support each other.

    Condoning the sin of another (and spousal abandonment is a sin) makes one guilty of that sin as well.
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    Offline solitary Man

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    Re: I need help
    « Reply #7 on: December 11, 2023, 06:54:05 PM »
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    • Quote from: Quo vadis Domine on December 10, 2023, 05:39:02 AM

    Why is there a good chance for your parents marriage to be invalid?
    What does this quote have to do with it, marriage annulment has existed since the Middle Ages
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    Offline Nadir

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    Re: I need help
    « Reply #8 on: December 11, 2023, 08:23:13 PM »
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    • Quote from: solitary Man on December 03, 2023, 10:21:38 AM
    I need help
    I feel alone without help
    ....
    their marriage has a high chance of being null and void!
    Quote from: Quo vadis Domine on December 10, 2023, 05:39:02 AM
    Why is there a good chance for your parents marriage to be invalid?
    Quote from: solitary Man on December 11, 2023, 06:54:05 PM
    What does this quote have to do with it, marriage annulment has existed since the Middle Ages
    You ask for help but when QVD asks you a simple question you go into attack mode. You did the same to me, who, out of compassion, responded to you on another thread. You show no sign that you will accept help.
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    Offline TheRealMcCoy

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    Re: I need help
    « Reply #9 on: December 11, 2023, 08:40:02 PM »
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    • Quote from: solitary Man on December 11, 2023, 06:54:05 PM
    What does this quote have to do with it, marriage annulment has existed since the Middle Ages
    You seem anxious for a divorce and annulment.  Is your mother already in a relationship with another man?
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    Offline Quo vadis Domine

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    Re: I need help
    « Reply #10 on: December 11, 2023, 08:40:47 PM »
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    • Quote from: solitary Man on December 11, 2023, 06:54:05 PM
    What does this quote have to do with it, marriage annulment has existed since the Middle Ages

    All I’m asking is: what is the basis for you to say that your parent’s marriage is invalid? 
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    For what doth it profit a man, if he gain the whole world, and suffer the loss of his own soul? Or what exchange shall a man give for his soul?

    Offline solitary Man

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    Re: I need help
    « Reply #11 on: December 11, 2023, 11:13:35 PM »
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    • Quote from: Nadir on December 11, 2023, 08:23:13 PM
    You ask for help but when QVD asks you a simple question you go into attack mode. You did the same to me, who, out of compassion, responded to you on another thread. You show no sign that you will accept help.
    sorry sorry! I swear it was by accident, I actually wanted to respond to another comment but I ended up making a mistake, it's just that I have a mild vision problem
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    Offline solitary Man

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    Re: I need help
    « Reply #12 on: December 11, 2023, 11:17:51 PM »
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    • Quote from: TheRealMcCoy on December 11, 2023, 08:40:02 PM
    You seem anxious for a divorce and annulment.  Is your mother already in a relationship with another man?
    Sorry it was a mistake, it's hard to say! People think I'm exaggerating when I say I no longer want to live with someone who is mentally abusive! No, my mother didn't date anyone, but my father dated someone else, including one of my father's aunts who told my mother's boss to try to stun her
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    Offline solitary Man

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    Re: I need help
    « Reply #13 on: December 11, 2023, 11:27:21 PM »
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    • Quote from: Quo vadis Domine on December 11, 2023, 08:40:47 PM
    All I’m asking is: what is the basis for you to say that your parent’s marriage is invalid?
    one of the spouses feels pressured against their will and another reason is the other is drunk
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    Offline TheRealMcCoy

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    Re: I need help
    « Reply #14 on: December 12, 2023, 02:25:07 AM »
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    • Quote from: solitary Man on December 11, 2023, 11:27:21 PM
    one of the spouses feels pressured against their will and another reason is the other is drunk
     Sorry but those are not grounds for an annulment. Besides there does not need to be an annulment which would just entice one or both of your parents into committing adultery anyway.
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