Author Topic: I - a white guy - can relate to those of mixed race and mixed culture (Read 2016 times)

Matthew · « **on:** October 22, 2013, 09:52:20 AM »

Apparently I am hispanic and/or have a "big" family.

I was in the grocery store the other day, and came out to find a fluorescent business card stuck to my window. The business card was not bilingual -- it was completely in Spanish.

No other cars around me had the same thing. It wasn't a scattershot operation.

Maybe they figured that a Suburban with a 4 car seats must not belong to an Anglo family? I must admit, it wasn't a bad guess, even though they were wrong in my case.

I feel like a child of mixed-race, or at least mixed culture. When I go to a heavily white/German area like New Braunfels, I feel out of place because of my Catholic culture (5 children pretty close together, my wife doesn't work outside the home, we don't live a suburban lifestyle, we don't use cloth cart covers when our children sit in the shopping cart, etc.). But when I go to a more hispanic city like Seguin, I am constantly aware that I don't fit in race-wise.

It's kind of frustrating to not feel like you fit in ANYWHERE.

Tiffany · « **Reply #1 on:** October 22, 2013, 10:09:48 AM »

I'd rather be with like minded people even if I don't speak the language or am the same race, Christian values are way more important and can be recognized between people. My Mexican neighbors who know little English but we have similar strong family/Western values have been so nice to live by, wish all my neighbors could be like them. Some things go beyond how you spice the rice or what grandma is called.

Cantarella · « **Reply #2 on:** October 22, 2013, 10:21:57 AM »

I can relate to those feeling also. I was born in the US by chance, but raised very far away. Came back a decade ago. I am a citizen in paper but will always be an immigrant at heart.

I like to remind myself that I am Catholic first and foremost and Catholicism is universal. Therefore, the fact that I cannot really relate to immigrants nor Americans do not really matter to me. Catholicism breaks those boundaries.

My Faith comes first and I belong with Catholics, regardless of their race or nationality. :smile:

Matthew · « **Reply #3 on:** October 22, 2013, 10:27:11 AM »

Quote from: Tiffany

I'd rather be with like minded people even if I don't speak the language or am the same race, Christian values are way more important and can be recognized between people. My Mexican neighbors who know little English but we have similar strong family/Western values have been so nice to live by, wish all my neighbors could be like them. Some things go beyond how you spice the rice or what grandma is called.

That's true, but no one likes to be different -- at least not day in, day out. It gets old.

Actually, we spice the rice about the same as those in Seguin -- we eat a lot of Mexican and Tex-Mex food around here. I also collect and sell scrap metal to the recycling place. There are plenty of ways I feel more like "Mateo" than "Matthew". But still, there are parts of Hispanic culture that are foreign to me, so I still feel like I don't belong. It's just an emotional feeling, but very real nonetheless.

What things make me stand out from others in the Mexican community?

1. My daughters don't have their ears pierced -- not even our 6 year old (gasp!)
2. My wife doesn't spend anything on beauty supplies (natural beauty all the way, and plenty of it!)
3. We homeschool
4. We don't have a TV in our house, let alone multiple TVs
5. We might pray the daily Rosary, but we don't hang one from our rearview mirror.
6. Neither of us has a cell phone
7. We don't use much cash
8. We never go to a payday loan store or pawn shop
9. My wife and I are boring Germans when it comes to partying.
10. My wife and I don't use birth control.

If I wanted to branch into the "younger generation" of Mexican-Americans, I could also include things like the boring rims on my car, our lack of tattoos, etc. But the items 1-9 above are pretty universal among all Mexicans I've seen in Texas.

I haven't met a Mexican family that homeschools. Mexicans, at least around here, seem to be VERY interested in partaking of American culture and the American way of life (maybe it's just our material things?) -- but they do love to keep their language alive. They are aloof in that respect.

Anna Maria · « **Reply #4 on:** October 22, 2013, 11:56:00 AM »

Quote from: Matthew

It's kind of frustrating to not feel like you fit in ANYWHERE.

Catholics know they are in the minority wherever they live and for as long as they live, but that shouldn't be a source of frustration. What's frustrating is the fact that so few care about the truth and what really happened to the Catholic Church after Vatican II.

claudel · « **Reply #5 on:** October 22, 2013, 12:14:45 PM »

Quote from: Tiffany

I'd rather be with like minded people even if I don't speak the language or am the same race, Christian values are way more important and can be recognized between people. My Mexican neighbors who know little English but we have similar strong family/Western values have been so nice to live by, wish all my neighbors could be like them. Some things go beyond how you spice the rice or what grandma is called.

The country that your Mexican neighbors hail from has a shoot-on-sight policy regarding illegal immigrants from Guatemala and other points to its south. Many of your Mexican neighbors, at least those that can read, probably also feel warmly toward a special-interest group called La Raza. Need I point out that those two words do not translate as "diversity is our greatest strength"?

The kind of all-we-need-is-love, let's-all-just-get-along sentimentality that you espouse may suit you right down to the ground. But when your kids—and the many kids of my Texan nieces and nephews—grow up to find themselves a distinct minority in a Houston or a San Antonio or an Austin that has the strong family values and racial tolerance and indifference to racial and ethnic bonds one finds today in Detroit, you'll have to forgive them for wanting to beat you into insensibility with a blunt instrument.

Zeitun · « **Reply #6 on:** October 22, 2013, 12:35:20 PM »

My pale white, freckled, blue-green eyed better half is one fourth Mexican! His brother has brown skin, brown eyes, and black hair. Go figure.

Tiffany · « **Reply #7 on:** October 22, 2013, 02:34:17 PM »

Quote from: claudel

Quote from: Tiffany
I'd rather be with like minded people even if I don't speak the language or am the same race, Christian values are way more important and can be recognized between people. My Mexican neighbors who know little English but we have similar strong family/Western values have been so nice to live by, wish all my neighbors could be like them. Some things go beyond how you spice the rice or what grandma is called.

The country that your Mexican neighbors hail from has a shoot-on-sight policy regarding illegal immigrants from Guatemala and other points to its south. Many of your Mexican neighbors, at least those that can read, probably also feel warmly toward a special-interest group called La Raza. Need I point out that those two words do not translate as "diversity is our greatest strength"?

The kind of all-we-need-is-love, let's-all-just-get-along sentimentality that you espouse may suit you right down to the ground. But when your kids—and the many kids of my Texan nieces and nephews—grow up to find themselves a distinct minority in a Houston or a San Antonio or an Austin that has the strong family values and racial tolerance and indifference to racial and ethnic bonds one finds today in Detroit, you'll have to forgive them for wanting to beat you into insensibility with a blunt instrument.

I'm not advocating for all we need is love and these people would not align themselves with La Raza. I'm sure they would risk their life to save my child as I would theirs. Our children are in danger from the born and bred in the USA Peurto Rican violent thugs and foul-mouthed sluts around us. The 40 yo white loser who lives below me dealing pot, chasing dysfunctional teen mothers, and having all sorts of aimless folks around drinking and partying is no good either.

John Grace · « **Reply #8 on:** October 24, 2013, 12:42:29 PM »

This thread actually came to mind as I was reading a book about Blessed Miguel Pro on the way home from Cork yesterday. The book written by Ann Ball.

ClarkSmith · « **Reply #9 on:** October 24, 2013, 06:35:49 PM »

A Croatian guy I know called it a Mickey Mouse culture. I understand what he meant. Americans consume and worship a lot of fictional media. I was just on a website that supports this stereotype. The blogger uploaded an image of an adult male with a new Batman/Joker tattoo. I thought the comments would be against this behavior but no they praised it. Americans are very much like adult children. Any intelligent adult would have a hard time relating to that culture.

Immaculata001 · « **Reply #10 on:** October 24, 2013, 09:41:27 PM »

Americans aren't really aware of how atypical their culture is. They tend to appropriate other cultural heritages (Irish-American, Italian-American), but my experience has been that Americans have less in common with any other cultures than they think they do. The culture here is most extreme in its radical individualism which has been spurred forward by radical capitalism and Protestantism. It's a shocking mix.

Somehow, it brings about the whole mickey mouse cultural thing. I personally think it's because Americans don't really suffer, but they think they do. For instance, there hasn't really been the kind of suffering in America that was happening in Ireland and France before the 1800s (widespread famine, etc). The American cινιℓ ωαr was pretty short. The country is young and for most of its brief history America has been extremely rich. There's no parallel in the rest of the world.

I happen to be a mixed-race person. What I've noticed is that Americans are extremely obsessed by race and are unique in their ideas of race. Both Black and White Americans really believe that race is a kind of destiny and is deterministic. This doesn't really exist anywhere else; it's a completely alien idea to culturally Catholic nations. Even the immigration debate in Europe is about cultural heritage and identity rather than racial determinism.

For those of us who are obviously racially ambiguous, it can cause constant, unwelcome attention and questioning in America. Luckily, I've traveled a lot and come from another culture and so I'm aware of how atypical this is. Wherever else I've gone in the world, people don't really care and are nonplussed, particularly in culturally Catholic nations...

LaramieHirsch · « **Reply #11 on:** October 25, 2013, 12:09:24 AM »

Quote from: ClarkSmith

Americans are very much like adult children. Any intelligent adult would have a hard time relating to that culture.

This 100%.

If you feel like a foreigner in your own land, you may be doing something right, here in 21st century USA.

You'll likely even get along with other actual foreigners. Seems a natural consequence.

Tiffany · « **Reply #12 on:** October 25, 2013, 12:41:01 PM »

Quote from: ClarkSmith

A Croatian guy I know called it a Mickey Mouse culture. I understand what he meant. Americans consume and worship a lot of fictional media. I was just on a website that supports this stereotype. The blogger uploaded an image of an adult male with a new Batman/Joker tattoo. I thought the comments would be against this behavior but no they praised it. Americans are very much like adult children. Any intelligent adult would have a hard time relating to that culture.

I know many Americans who could not recognize Batman.. you are definitely stereotyping.

Sigismund · « **Reply #13 on:** October 25, 2013, 09:20:17 PM »

Quote from: Matthew

It's kind of frustrating to not feel like you fit in ANYWHERE.

Well, you fit nicely into the Kingdom of God. :smile:

alaric · « **Reply #14 on:** October 26, 2013, 07:49:38 AM »

[b]Maybe they figured that a Suburban with a 4 car seats must not belong to an Anglo family? [/b]

In certain parts of NY, especially Brooklyn, you might be mistaken for a Hasidic Jєω. :scratchchin: