CathInfo.com

So, I am not entirely sure what you are trying to say here. I love my husband to death, he’s my support system, prayer buddy, pretty much everything to me. But if he does something stupid, or if I feel he’s being a little happy go lucky with our money I’m going to say something. If I feel he is not holdin up his part in marriage I’m gonna tell that man to shape up. I work extremely hard to taking care of 3 kids under 5. Including a house, and errands to do. I could definitely say I have the easier part of this arrangement. He owns a business and has to deal with crazy people, he pays the bills, but we budget together. The only people I ever have to deal with our the kids, him, and my mom tribe. But I don’t think I’m stepping out of place by telling him, or bringing to mind how his actions are having a negative effect. Does that make me disobedient? No, we are a team. I have his back, and he has mine. If he doesn’t order me around, and I don’t order him. I don’t even see how marriage could work the way you’re saying it should :/




I’ve been married six years to my amazing man, and I’m not ashamed to say I am previously divorced. It was a huge mistake at 18 marrying a non Catholic in a non Catholic ceremony. My hubby, and I have not had an extremely easy marriage. We talked quits multiple times in the past. I can honestly say I never ever once thought of taking anything but the kids stuff, and mine when leaving. I walked as fast as I could away from my ex literally leaving with one outfit. So no not all women want to bleed a man dry during divorce.

That attitude of telling him to "shape up" is disrespectful towards your husband ... not to mention referring to him as "that man".  I understand what you're trying to say, but saying it this way is disrespectful.  Nor should a devoted Catholic couple ever "talk quits" ... unless it's to the point of being grave enough to legitimately justify separation.

Just in case anyone thinks Ladislaus is only saying this from a male perspective, I completely agree with him.

The husband is the head of the family.  While a man and woman have equal dignity before God, a marriage is not a partnership of equals.  If anyone does not understand this, please read the homily I posted earlier today: https://www.cathinfo.com/catholic-living-in-the-modern-world/a-homily-on-marriage-by-st-john-chrysostom/msg616869/?topicseen#msg616869

Especially relevant:

For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the Church: and He is the Saviour of the Body. There fore as the Church is subject unto Christ, so let wives be subject to their own husbands in everything. Notice that after saying the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the Church, he immediately says that the Church is His Body, and He is Himself its Saviour. It is the head that upholds the well-being of the body. In his other epistles Paul has already laid the foundations of marital love, and has assigned to husband and wife each his proper place: to the husband one of leader and provider, and to the wife one of submission. Therefore as the Church is subject to Christ–and the Church, remember, consists of both husbands and wives—so let wives also be subject in everything to their husbands, as to God. 

But this is only half of the teaching.  St. John Chrysostom addresses husbands:

You have seen the amount of obedience necessary; now hear about the amount of love necessary. Do you want your wife to be obedient to you, as the Church is to Christ? Then be responsible for the same providential care of her, as Christ is for the Church. And even if it becomes necessary for you to give your life for her, yes, and even to endure and undergo suffering of any kind, do not refuse. Even though you undergo all this, you will never have done anything equal to what Christ has done. You are sacrificing yourself for someone to whom you are already joined, but He offered Himself up for one who turned her back on Him and hated Him. In the same way, then, as He honored her by putting at His feet one who turned her back on Him, who hated, rejected, and disdained Him as tie accomplished this not with threats, or violence, or terror, or anything else like that, but through His untiring love; so also you should behave toward your wife.