Author Topic: how do you raise you children in the faith in a fragmented family (Read 4714 times)

alemany · « **on:** September 22, 2009, 01:26:57 PM »

Back in 2004 when a priest gave my wife and mother of six children, the permission to leave me while I was undergoing a sickness. And now this priest is a superior general of North America we were in Maple Hill at the time.

Anyway now that several years have passed she went and got remarried to a guy who has three children so now she takes care of nine children. and now has breast cancer, and going through treatment.

I'm in the process of moving out to the state that she's living in to be closer to my children. At one point in time I used to be very staunch and my faith, and put a lot of friction between her parents and me since they are flaming liberals. they hate me because of my faith, it is so bad that they're not my children are not even allowed to mention my name in their presence.

So I want my children to grow up in the faith, but right now it seems like I have my hands tied. it's the role of the father to pass down the faith. I don't even really know how to approach this situation any longer, without causing conflict. On thing I think I can do is try to be an example?

The children are still young and don't have all the sacraments yet, since some of them were baptized in the Byzantine rite. I don't have to worry about confirmation. but the rest of them were baptized in the Latin right and have yet to take first Communion, and receive all the sacraments.

Natural order of the family has then destroyed, now it is completely disordered and fragmented. So I don't know what to do anymore, except try to get back into the faith and didn't do my best to be a Catholic. think a lot of the responsibility now is can fall in a mother's shoulders, because she knows the faith and she knows her obligation to get the children of the sacraments. since I'm pretty much out of the picture exit from being a weekend daddy and daddy on the WebCam I can only do so much.

so if this makes any sense to anyone feel free to chime in throwdown a few ideas or if you have a questions feel free to PM me I can use all the help I can get!

Telesphorus · « **Reply #1 on:** September 22, 2009, 06:43:00 PM »

Quote from: alemany

Back in 2004 when a priest gave my wife and mother of six children, the permission to leave me while I was undergoing a sickness. And now this priest is a superior general of North America we were in Maple Hill at the time.

The conciliar religion hates the Catholic family.

Quote

I'm in the process of moving out to the state that she's living in to be closer to my children. At one point in time I used to be very staunch and my faith, and put a lot of friction between her parents and me since they are flaming liberals. they hate me because of my faith, it is so bad that they're not my children are not even allowed to mention my name in their presence.

That's too bad. It's a good warning though, as to the necessity of avoiding marrying a spouse who does not have the Faith.

Quote

So I want my children to grow up in the faith, but right now it seems like I have my hands tied. it's the role of the father to pass down the faith. I don't even really know how to approach this situation any longer, without causing conflict. On thing I think I can do is try to be an example?

Yes, try to act in a way to make them want to honor you.

Quote

The children are still young and don't have all the sacraments yet, since some of them were baptized in the Byzantine rite. I don't have to worry about confirmation. but the rest of them were baptized in the Latin right and have yet to take first Communion, and receive all the sacraments.

Until they are old enough to be free of their mother's control there is little you can do but try to encourage them.

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Natural order of the family has then destroyed, now it is completely disordered and fragmented. So I don't know what to do anymore, except try to get back into the faith and didn't do my best to be a Catholic. think a lot of the responsibility now is can fall in a mother's shoulders, because she knows the faith and she knows her obligation to get the children of the sacraments. since I'm pretty much out of the picture exit from being a weekend daddy and daddy on the WebCam I can only do so much.

You can only do what you can do.

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so if this makes any sense to anyone feel free to chime in throwdown a few ideas or if you have a questions feel free to PM me I can use all the help I can get!

I'm sorry for you, I don't know what to say. Be careful, don't do anything that could be used against you by those perfidious family courts.

Caraffa · « **Reply #2 on:** September 24, 2009, 05:42:42 PM »

Quote from: alemany

Back in 2004 when a priest gave my wife and mother of six children, the permission to leave me while I was undergoing a sickness. And now this priest is a superior general of North America we were in Maple Hill at the time.

What was his rationale? Was this priest FSSP?

Quote

Anyway now that several years have passed she went and got remarried to a guy who has three children so now she takes care of nine children. and now has breast cancer, and going through treatment.

I'm in the process of moving out to the state that she's living in to be closer to my children. At one point in time I used to be very staunch and my faith, and put a lot of friction between her parents and me since they are flaming liberals. they hate me because of my faith, it is so bad that they're not my children are not even allowed to mention my name in their presence.

Was your wife an unbeliever?

Quote

So I want my children to grow up in the faith, but right now it seems like I have my hands tied. it's the role of the father to pass down the faith. I don't even really know how to approach this situation any longer, without causing conflict. On thing I think I can do is try to be an example?

I will keep in my prayers Alemany. I don't want to sound fatalistic, but your children will have much difficulty keeping faith given the circuмstances. But do not give up on them. There are Trads out there who have divorced parents, yet did keep the faith

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The children are still young and don't have all the sacraments yet, since some of them were baptized in the Byzantine rite. I don't have to worry about confirmation. but the rest of them were baptized in the Latin right and have yet to take first Communion, and receive all the sacraments.

Natural order of the family has then destroyed, now it is completely disordered and fragmented. So I don't know what to do anymore, except try to get back into the faith and didn't do my best to be a Catholic. think a lot of the responsibility now is can fall in a mother's shoulders, because she knows the faith and she knows her obligation to get the children of the sacraments. since I'm pretty much out of the picture exit from being a weekend daddy and daddy on the WebCam I can only do so much.

If your wife did believe, then you are right, it is in her court. Those children's souls are on her shoulders and God will hold her accountable. Was you first marriage annulled? If not then your wife is in a state of perpetual mortal sin.

Matthew · « **Reply #3 on:** September 24, 2009, 06:11:56 PM »

It's disgusting how the modern Catholic Church breaks up perfectly legitimate marriages. I'd love to know the excuse for Alemany's case. Unless the marriage was invalid from the beginning, there is NO reason to permit the wife to leave him and remarry.

Even if he was beating her, she could leave him for her safety, but she couldn't remarry.

And when you look at the list of things that would make a marriage invalid -- the chances aren't good.

Did she found out she was related to him? Was a shotgun or physical force involved right before the wedding?
Was one or both spouses lacking the power of reason at the time of the wedding?
Did one or both spouses never intend to have children (this was proven wrong by the fact they had 6 children)

But "the flame just wasn't there anymore" is NOT a good enough reason for an annulment. Nor is "irreconcilable differences".

Matthew

Lybus · « **Reply #4 on:** September 24, 2009, 06:21:43 PM »

Saint Jospeh is the patron Saint of families. I reccommend a novena.

Jacafamala · « **Reply #5 on:** September 24, 2009, 06:52:19 PM »

well you can pray and you can offer sacrifices. Don't lose heart.

Raoul76 · « **Reply #6 on:** September 24, 2009, 07:09:28 PM »

CM · « **Reply #7 on:** September 25, 2009, 12:11:54 AM »

Raoul76 is right. But beware and avoid heretical clergy (most of them).

Alex · « **Reply #8 on:** September 25, 2009, 02:55:06 AM »

The current Catholic Church is the true Church! Priests sinning, giving bad advice, or creating scandal does not invalidate the true Church (not even if the Pope himself were to cause scandal would that mean that the post-conciliar Catholic Church is no longer the true Church). So don't listen to the sedevacantists, Alemany.

That being said, I think the only thing you really can do in a situation like this is to pray alot and make many sacrifices for the souls of your children. Also, give each one of your childlren a blessed Green Scapular (if they don't want to wear it, then secretly place one in their bedroom - such as in between the bed frame (and say the prayer on the Green Scapular every day for them). The Blessed Virgin promised that she would use this sacramental to pray for the conversion of not only non-Catholics but also lapsed Catholics.

Belloc · « **Reply #9 on:** September 25, 2009, 10:22:36 AM »

Quote from: Alex

The current Catholic Church is the true Church! Priests sinning, giving bad advice, or creating scandal does not invalidate the true Church

True, one can hold office but be a reprobate......even Saul and David sinned.David was both priest and king....

Whether Joseph Ratzinger as a man is sinning or hold ambigous positions is not the point.....also, as a cleric, no lawful authority has ever judged him......

example-lets say after Luther's public excommunication,a majority of Cardinals at a conclave voted for him as Pope......then he would not be valid........

lets say the same Cardinals instead voted for Erasmus..he held very questionable views, but never publicly denied dogma and no tribunal,etc ruled him a heretic......

Erasmus would not be best choice in our eyes, but maybe the fact God put in on Papal throne was for his own betterment.....

B16 after all has made some moves toward Tradition and away from V2........lets hope he continues......

we ignore his private musings and do not follow him in doing sin, say pulling a Jp2 Assisi prayer gathering.......

hope my points, faulty as they are, are making some sense.....

Belloc · « **Reply #10 on:** September 25, 2009, 10:24:24 AM »

Quote from: alemany

Back in 2004 when a priest gave my wife and mother of six children, the permission to leave me while I was undergoing a sickness. And now this priest is a superior general of North America we were in Maple Hill at the time.

Sorry to hear this sad news, said priest will now have to answer for it, possibly in church court, definately before God......

what ever happended to "till death due us part"?..esp remarriage is out for her.......

Belloc · « **Reply #11 on:** September 25, 2009, 10:32:56 AM »

Quote from: Raoul76

If you came to the real Catholic Church ( sedevacantists ) they probably wouldn't even recognize your wife's remarriage. Officially, you are not really even divorced, because VII has no authority. Of course that leaves you with the problematic situation that your wife has been living with another man adulterously. But it's the same with my parents who divorced -- the sedes are very iffy about my dad's remarriage and probably consider it null and void.

You sound like a Prot, the "real church"? Guy is hurting and you take time to spew meaningless-not unusual for you at all-crappola.....you fail to recognise Christ's vicar and hence, you are outside, not he.....as Sedevacantists are divided on who was last Pope and aother particulars, then hwo can it be Catholic, no unity ya see..Sedevacantism is a belief, but the only real thing unifying it is a belief in no Pope, other than that, it falls into different camps....some reasoned people with decency like Glaudius,some well.....

what does V2 have to do with his marriage status or children.........it was never meant to be doctrinal at all, but pastoral, despite the bad fruits....i ignore V2 all together....but say V2 "has no authority" does not address his angst and issues.....

as for parents getting divorced, me thinks it is scarring you deeper and maybe, a reason for your anger and rebellion now....perhaps a beam is in thine own eye that needs removing first......sorry for hearing about the parents, truly is said, but me thinks it is adversly coloring your discernment now.....

Belloc · « **Reply #12 on:** September 25, 2009, 10:34:32 AM »

Quote from: Catholic Martyr

Raoul76 is right. But beware and avoid heretical clergy (most of them).

you two agree, how nice, not surprisng......are you actually admitting that some clergy are not heretical (most of them means not all of them are).? How are they clergy if no authorities exist to make them clergy to begin with? WHo is their presiding bishop? :confused1:

Belloc · « **Reply #13 on:** September 25, 2009, 10:35:28 AM »

Quote from: ChantCd

It's disgusting how the modern Catholic Church breaks up perfectly legitimate marriages. I'd love to know the excuse for Alemany's case. Unless the marriage was invalid from the beginning, there is NO reason to permit the wife to leave him and remarry.

Even if he was beating her, she could leave him for her safety, but she couldn't remarry.

And when you look at the list of things that would make a marriage invalid -- the chances aren't good.

Did she found out she was related to him? Was a shotgun or physical force involved right before the wedding?
Was one or both spouses lacking the power of reason at the time of the wedding?
Did one or both spouses never intend to have children (this was proven wrong by the fact they had 6 children)

But "the flame just wasn't there anymore" is NOT a good enough reason for an annulment. Nor is "irreconcilable differences".

Matthew

Good and reasoned points.....even Prots see the annulment mill for what hypocrisy it is..try talking to them and knocking their divorces, the ycome back saying things about our easy anulments...

alemany · « **Reply #14 on:** September 25, 2009, 11:09:32 AM »

This last weekend I went out for a visit, the irony is the children are so well behaved.And my X attibutes it to my formation of them! to this day she give's me all the credit of being a great father?

Now she has breast cancer and is going threw that,I must be as positive as I can to her situation.