Author Topic: Godparents --- How do you chose them? (Read 1016 times)

Hobbledehoy · « **on:** April 06, 2011, 01:19:37 AM »

Hi everybody:

I am curious to know how traditional Catholic families choose Godparents for their children, either Baptism or Confirmation, or how adult converts chose their own Godparents for either of these Sacraments.

What exactly makes a family or individual chose one particular Catholic to be a Godparent [or Sponsor], as opposed to another Catholic, in the context of the present day traditional Chapel life, particularly when the extended family is not traditional Catholic or even practicing NO Catholic?

I have seen cases wherein Godparents or Sponsors are chosen almost at random at the last minute. Once I was asked to be Godparent for a kid whom I did not know nor had ever seen, nor did I have any acquaintance with his family or background. I answered in the negative because I understood then that Godparents have to answer for the religious instruction and edification of their Godchildren at Judgment Day, and I did not know if I was ever going to get the chance of even meeting the kid ever again after the ceremony.

MaterDominici · « **Reply #1 on:** April 08, 2011, 12:23:32 AM »

Here's our thought process...

First, if we thought we had the ideal candidates for Godparents, we'd probably use the same individuals for each of our children. As we don't consider anyone we know to be the "perfect" choice (as I'll explain shortly), we've so far gone with different Godparents for each child.

What would be the ideal? I think it would be a family member or incredibly close family friend to ensure that some degree of contact between the Godparent and the child continues to be possible as the years pass. Also, ideally they'd live nearby.

Now, the only Traditional Catholics in our family live 1000+ miles from us (and even those options are quite limited). For some Godparents, we've gone with family members eventhough they never see our children. For others, we've leaned the other way and chosen people we know from our chapel that may or may not still be in this area 5, 10, 15 years from now.

Given that, we do try and choose people who seem more stable and likely to stick around -- our chapel's coordinator, for instance. I wouldn't intentionally try and burden someone with trying to keep spiritual track of a child they aren't related to and never see.

Above all, they have to (at least outwardly) be a solid Catholic who we hope will take their job seriously and say a few prayers for our kids.

MaterDominici · « **Reply #2 on:** April 08, 2011, 12:25:33 AM »

Quote from: Hobbledehoy

Once I was asked to be Godparent for a kid whom I did not know nor had ever seen, nor did I have any acquaintance with his family or background. I answered in the negative because I understood then that Godparents have to answer for the religious instruction and edification of their Godchildren at Judgment Day, and I did not know if I was ever going to get the chance of even meeting the kid ever again after the ceremony.

Are you sure they were asking that you be his Godparent and not just a stand-in? We do grab our stand-ins at the last minute from whomever is around. (Although we do at least know enough people to not have to ask a stranger to stand in for a baptism.)

Olive · « **Reply #3 on:** April 08, 2011, 06:15:34 PM »

This sort of runs hand-in-hand with a post I had made regarding Baptism. With our first couple of children, we chose family - only one of whom was actually a trad Catholic. With the others, we chose trad friends from our chapel. The priest we have now says that we can only choose 100% trads for godparents. This has caused some irritation - to put it mildly - with some of our family.

Hobbledehoy · « **Reply #4 on:** April 09, 2011, 01:02:24 AM »

Quote from: MaterDominici

Are you sure they were asking that you be his Godparent and not just a stand-in? We do grab our stand-ins at the last minute from whomever is around. (Although we do at least know enough people to not have to ask a stranger to stand in for a baptism.)

Yes. The Sacristan told me that I would be the Godparent, not a proxy for another Catholic. It was the Sacristan, not the family (whom I never saw), who asked me. I would not have had a problem being a proxy for someone else, as then it would be his responsibility before God and the child.