God created each person with a vocation and a purpose.

But some people note that their local Trad chapel doesn't have any (or more than 2) singles that even qualify for marriage. There are no options locally, and so they wonder what God's plan for them is. Especially when they feel called to marriage!

But who's to say it isn't God's will to meet your spouse ONLINE? Because the Internet is evil or has cooties?

It's true that there is a lot of porn on the Internet (on a percentage basis), but it's also very easy to avoid. You can spend hours on the Net and not touch a single porn site. I would know!

Long story short, the Internet is a neutral communications medium, like the telephone, telegraph, or a written letter. All of those things can be used for good or evil.

Here's my point:

When God created you, he also chose a TIME for your existence to begin. For all the young people today, that was sometime in the late 20th or early 21st century. When the Internet existed. God took the Internet into His calculations, I assure you.

Something as big as the Internet, which affects the knowledge (intellect) and choices (Free will) of millions -- certainly God is factoring something so important into His plan.

So it's not "more Catholic" or even "more of a Catholic mind" to eschew the Internet when looking for a spouse. It's called "more old-fashioned".

But being old-fashioned has lots of consequences -- some good, some bad. It might result in being single for life. Just like choosing to despise car ownership might result in being unemployed for life!

I've encountered this many times in the past 2 decades -- the notion that Internet people come from a different "pool" than "real people".

As an Internet person, I resent that.

Anyhow, I understand the mindset. We read our "lives of the saints" and we want to imitate them. Really, we want to re-create those lives as much as possible. But this isn't 18th century France.

It sounds odd to think of a saint booting up his computer and opening his web browser. But I assure you that God is still making saints today (regardless of whether or not they'll be canonized), and most of them use computers to some degree! So we just have to get over that "mental hang-up" where using the Net seems inappropriate for holy people.

Where do you purpose that people seek out these internet singles? I know there are a few 'sspx singles' sites. The resistance will certainly make things more difficult, or at least interesting.

Where do you purpose that people seek out these internet singles? I know there are a few 'sspx singles' sites. The resistance will certainly make things more difficult, or at least interesting.

Don't forget about sedevacantistsingles.com

I see how the internet is something neutral as a means of communication, but it is also true, as Rosarium pointed out, that people may act differently in person as opposed to online. It can be easy to seem like an outgoing all-around character online whereas such an individual could really be someone quiet and reserved. Of course, I guess that person would simply be choosing deception through the internet with such false impression online. I think it can be difficult in particular to read the emotions of people online.

I agree still though that God chose many of us here on this forum to find it and to discover His Truth through the internet. I mean I am an example I would say of such a soul. I had never heard of the SSPX until I first read it being mentioned on the internet Question & Answer forum on EWTN's website several years ago. Since then, I have learned more via the internet aside from books.

More than likely though, traditional Catholics who are indeed genuine probably barely use the internet and have mainly contact within perhaps their own chapel network. Before I got to my chapel, I would talk to a lot of traditional Catholics online, especially through Fisheaters and instant messaging, but it was not quite the same as regular face-to-face human interaction, even though I must admit that I can also still find that daunting in certain circuмstances today, being almost thirty years old.

From what I have seen so far (finding myself in the single trad-cath trenches) the internet does seem to offer some help. I did signup for the SSPX site and also the big one Cathmatch.  Unfortunately, the SSPX site is quite dead, and the women that are on there don't seem all that interested in responding anyways. Which is too bad I thought the idea of a place where traditional Catholic singles could meet was/is a good one.  The big site has 1000s of active singles, but from what I can see so far at least, is pretty much a wasteland of Novus Ordo career women...

But one advantage to courtship via internet is that assuming both parties are honest (big assumption) you can discuss matters of faith, morality and otherwise difficult questions that are hard to bring up in normal conversation and sort of weed out modernists/liberals *cough, birth control, cough*.  A distance courtship can also help keep a couple chaste, although if both parties are desiring to sin, then we humans can always find a way.

I guess it is worth asking Matthew, how should single traditional Catholics use this forum as a resource? What is appropriate, a sub-forum or sticky thread? What do you think is best?

Luke

How about a Trad conference for singles?  One in the east, one mid-west, one western?

Marsha

thanks for the link jen51, errr I think!! That thread seemed to get derailed in a hurry, not sure if it is still active.  I'll think about posting something on there.

Luke

I don't recommend the internet...especially when one person is in Fla..and the other in Oregon...And it takes them a yr or so to meet...They e-ml, chat on the phone and invest a lot of time and effort...They build up a sense, rather they instill a sense, that this person is the cure for their loneliness and every other problem...they convince themselves, very often, that this person-who may be very incompatible-is meant for them...It happens all the time...No..most people are incompatible in the first place...the idea that some stranger on the internet is compatible..Let God put the person in your PHYSICAL path.

The problem, though, is that some Trads have to use the internet in order to meet a potential spouse.