Those are fair points which I hadn’t considered up to this point. The cases I know from Cincinnati are cases where both sets of parents observed and approved, but maybe not all cases are like that, I don’t know. Of course in today’s world no way of finding a spouse will be perfect. An uncompromising Traditional father who will require his approval for marriage to his daughters is also very valuable now since it’s so rare.
I know Traditional Catholic or traditional-minded fathers who require their approval for young men to marry their daughters. But they’re all either lax on Traditional moral disciplines and only focus on the Faith, or are willing to kick their daughters out at 18 if they don’t go to college, or make them pay rent if they live at home. They also consider women’s college education to be very important and consider it harmful for a woman to not go to college.
I just want a way to meet more suitable young women. I would personally always try to get her father’s permission and I would make sure our courtship was done under watchful eyes. But Traditional Catholics are already so rare and Traditional young women are seemingly even rarer sadly. To me, something like a YAG would be a way to at least see maybe meet someone, though it’s far from a guarantewant
I sympathize with your struggles. But one should always remember it is better to not marry than to marry poorly. If you read the other thread, there was a woman who met her husband at a YAG and they ended up in a terrible marriage. Let the buyer beware. It is also good to remember that many parents could end up eternally damned if they fail to provide the proper guidance for their children.
Technically, the father does not have the right to forbid his daughter or son from marrying someone if they are the age of majority. So my use of the word "approval" is admittedly vague. The problem for the fathers is that if they wait too long to take action, their child may end up resenting them and will end up tearing the entire family apart. Then the child has no concern if their parent's approve of their spouse or not. That's not good. In the movie I mentioned earlier, the young woman was 23. That is way too late for a father to leave her to her own devices to seek out life on her own.
In my first post on the other thread, I mentioned women become unhinged outside of their homes, they huddle up with their friends, making them basically impossible to court because young men like you and I won't show approach a woman when she is with her girlfriends. But the young adult gatherings foster only those kinds of group settings making it impossible for young men to approach young women without it feeling unnatural. And if you fail to impress a girl, your reputation gets shot. And word will spread. Your face will be on the dart boards at these YAGS you have never attended.
I highly encourage you to read the other thread discussing this very in depth. My posts in the first several pages are anonymous but I'm sure you can figure out which posts are mine. I think this topic is extremely important because many priests and parents promote these gatherings as a suitable replacement for traditional courtship practices. But really it is way for them to shirk their responsibilities towards their subjects and deflect blame on the young people if the situation turns into a disaster.
https://www.cathinfo.com/anonymous-posts-allowed/church-fathers-on-finding-a-husband/