Author Topic: Compassion and emotion (Read 1567 times)

Kephapaulos · « **on:** February 11, 2017, 01:58:46 AM »

I have trouble with showing compassion and proper emotion. I just don't want to serve feelings and not be honest with the truth though and lie.

AMDGJMJ · « **Reply #1 on:** February 11, 2017, 09:01:27 AM »

Quote from: Kephapaulos

I have trouble with showing compassion and proper emotion. I just don't want to serve feelings and not be honest with the truth though and lie.

Everything in moderation. The saints say that there is a time and place for everything under the sun. :-)

Everyone has things that they struggle with. Some people are over-emotional and have to learn to be less so. Some people tend to not feel others pain, and have to learn to be more empathetic. Praying to grow in charity often helps in this, and also humility.

songbird · « **Reply #2 on:** February 12, 2017, 08:40:19 AM »

Letters and greeting cards can say it: I don't thank you enough, or I don't say I love you as I should. So, very true. I knew of a friend who went to her first funeral and laughed, which embarrassed her and she had no control. She said she would never go to a funeral again. I told her, don't let that keep you from going to a funeral again. Chances are very probable that laughing will not happen again.

AMDGJMJ · « **Reply #3 on:** February 12, 2017, 01:49:38 PM »

Quote from: songbird

Letters and greeting cards can say it: I don't thank you enough, or I don't say I love you as I should. So, very true. I knew of a friend who went to her first funeral and laughed, which embarrassed her and she had no control. She said she would never go to a funeral again. I told her, don't let that keep you from going to a funeral again. Chances are very probable that laughing will not happen again.

I often find that I am inclined to laugh when I am nervous, and funerals can sometimes be that way...

I knew someone who was a best man at his brother's wedding (protestant) and could not help but burst out laughing when they played a song something like, "I said I love you but I lied.", and he was sent out of the church... I guess the song went on to say that "I more than just love you." But, it definitely made a memory for them all... ;-)

Another horrible story is one a friend of mine told me. His boss is SUPER obsessed with the Wizard of Oz, has posters all over his house, has it as his phone ringtone, etc. Well, one day his aunt died and he went to the funeral. During the middle of it his phone went off, "Ding dong the witch is dead..." SO AWFUL!!! ...Yet, terribly funny at the same time... One again protestant... And that is why we turn our phones off at Mass. :-)

Nadir · « **Reply #4 on:** February 12, 2017, 09:30:07 PM »

Quote from: Kephapaulos

I have trouble with showing compassion and proper emotion. I just don't want to serve feelings and not be honest with the truth though and lie.

Kephapaulos, when you say you "have trouble with showing compassion and proper emotion" I wonder if it is in spite of feeling compassion but not showing it, or if you don't easily feel compassion. Also it depends on what you perceive as proper emotion. Is it proper for you, or do others criticise you for lack of "proper" emotion?

It has been known as manly, in the past, not to show emotion too readily. Do you fall into the "manly" category?

Kephapaulos · « **Reply #5 on:** February 15, 2017, 03:33:13 PM »

I think I do then have compassion but have a hard time showing it, Nadir. I can sometimes display too much hilarity where I smile and laugh a lot. On the other hand, maybe it's also just the way the modern world can be because it is not a true happy place since most reject God.

I think most of the time I show proper emotion, but it can be a little difficult for me to do so still where I can get confused and unsure about what to do depending on the situation.

I guess you could say that I do sometimes fall into the "manly" category. I have seen so much how emotions can take over. As Matthew mentioned about Latin blood in the Fr. Raphael thread, I fall into that category too, but I can look through it.

songbird · « **Reply #6 on:** February 15, 2017, 05:03:57 PM »

I came from a family of 9 kids. My dad worked, and worked and slept when he could. I remember my dad or mom saying, that dad did not show emotion/love wise. Hm? He found 9 children. He was not one to say, "I love You", guess or was not of the frisky kind. My mom knew that, but there is more ways to express it.

Come to find out, I am like that and I am a daughter. I told my husband, when we were dating, I would not just blurt out, "I love you". I would when I knew for sure and not till then. When he heard it and how I came to find out, he was very pleased to say the least. And come to find out, he wants to hear "Thank You" more often.

Well, I am, it doesn't come out so much, but I don't want to give the impression that I just expect certain ways of him, like going to work. I found out after 40 years, he would rather hear "Thank You", than I Love you. Hm? I tried to say both. Because I don't say it, he might think I am thinking of myself. Hm? Do I smell the devil some where trying to creep in?

Was it the way I was brought up? Or is it a personality like my dad? Is it a learned thing? I do know this much, it pays to know the person you marry. It sure helps a lot because understanding can grow and you can laugh about things.

My husband may say, "Hey, you passed me by twice and no kiss" OK, so I kiss him so much that he has had enough and I am good to go passed him, all paid up!

Kephapaulos · « **Reply #7 on:** February 15, 2017, 07:09:08 PM »

Quote from: Kephapaulos

I think I do then have compassion but have a hard time showing it, Nadir. I can sometimes display too much hilarity where I smile and laugh a lot. On the other hand, maybe it's also just the way the modern world can be because it is not a true happy place since most reject God.

I think most of the time I show proper emotion, but it can be a little difficult for me to do so still where I can get confused and unsure about what to do depending on the situation.

I guess you could say that I do sometimes fall into the "manly" category. I have seen so much how emotions can take over. As Matthew mentioned about Latin blood in the Fr. Raphael thread, I fall into that category too, but I can look through it.

EDIT: "but I can look past it."