I agree that a face to face talk with a priest is superior to asking a question on the internet of a bunch of lay people.
However, we live hundreds of miles from a Traditional Mass parish ... and I can't just call one of the priests on the phone to ask him about this .... at least I don't think I can.
The N.O. priest we have here is a very nice man. However, he doesn't think a lot of things are a very big deal. For example he didn't think the sin of immodesty was that important.
As far as a reversal goes .... I did look into that years ago ... it would cost a minimum of $10,000. The "success" depends on the type of procedure done .... Mine was the most destructive possible (thanks Dr. M). It is not covered by insurance. It also increases the possibility of an ectopic pregnancy which causes the embryo to attach to the interior of the fallopian tube instead of the uterine wall. The pregnancy cannot continue, and the mother and baby would die.
I already have two children. I felt that because of the cost, the risk, and the fact that I alread have two children who needed me during those still-fertile years, I opted not to try to have the procedure done (also, the procedures were being done by doctors in North Carolina and other places that were extremely far from our home .... and there would have been thousands more costs for travel expenses).
These are not excuses. They are well thought out reasons that I decided not to try to have this reversed.
These verses I was thinking about:
1 Cor 7:3
"Let the husband render the debt to his wife: and the wife also in like manner to the husband."
1 Cor 7:5
"Defraud not one another, except, perhaps, by consent, for a time, that you may give yourselves to prayer: and return together again, lest Satan tempt you for your incontinency."
St. Paul doesn't make a distinction about the age of the wife and so it doesn't seem to matter whether she is fertile or not. Now granted there's no situation that is like one who is intentionally infertile. But apparently, an old, infertile wife is still suppose to render the marriage debt, even if it is impossible for the husband and wife to conceive.
The other reason that I mentioned this problem on this forum is because so often you read people lambasting those who practice contraception.
And while I agree wholeheartedly that it is a grave evil. Not all who've practiced this horrible act, can just undue it...stop doing it, simply and easily. Obviously, the fact that I can't have any more children, has been the greatest pain and regre tof my life. Not only for the bad I've done to our Lord, but also to myself, my husband and our children. I will live with the pain of this my whole life.
The work of my Purgatory .... I remember reading a book called "The Great Magdalenes." I was surprised to learn that even though these great, public sinners had confessed and been absolved, they still lived out the rest of their lives paying penance for their sins. They dressed in rags, sold all their material possessions and gave the money to the poor, fasted and prayed and confessed regularly, and publicly announced their sinfulness to the public they'd previously scandalized.
That was the first time I learned that being absolved in Confession didn't pay the debt. My H thought that that was the case as well .... in the N.O. church that's the teaching.
I've told several people about what I've done to hope to help them to either not do the same, or to go to Confession for it ...
I have to pay for this sin the rest of my life .... in real terms and in spiritual terms.
Thank you for your prayers and help.
God Bless,
MrsZ