As you may know, I've opted for a celibate lifestyle a few months ago, in an attempt to avoid sin and wordly corruption.
It's gone extremely well and in fact I now rarely even get a glimpse of a carnal thought.
However, lately, in the last weeks or so, the world started to lure me back, with desires of companionship and haunting memories of my past romantic life.
Not at all sinful, yet temptations to try once again to mingle with what I know to be dangers.
It is true God created Man and Woman to be together, and I find the prospect of living the rest of my life alone, but living among people (heathens at that) unbearably bleak.
Now the obvious solution is to marry, as the Gospel itself suggest.
However that (finding a chaste honest religious mate) is de facto impossible, for me at least.
Now, my utmost desire would be to live a heremitic life, away from all people and temptations, but given how that's impossible, and I'm going to daily be exposed to reminders and allures of an alternative lifestyle ("normal life" by today's standards) I frankly do not know what to do.
Any help is appreciated, because if I have to be honest, I'm starting to realise emotions are clouding my judgement and I'm losing my cool, calculated and clear rational mind.
Thanks in advance.