Author Topic: "Pray for Me" (Read 1599 times)

Dulcamara · « **on:** July 10, 2010, 07:13:14 PM »

"Pray for Me"
(all rights reserved)

The day that I'm no longer there
I won't ask you not to care
but there some things I don't want
for you to do when I am gone

Don't throw a party in my name
don't cry too long cause it's in vain
don't wish that I would come right back
there's more to life than only that

Don't say that I have gone to heav'n
because I may not be there yet
and if on earth you'd help me out
then pray for me and don't forget

Don't leave me gifts upon my grave
don't hate the One that made me leave
I'd trade one Ave for each rose
I can use that more than those

Don't say my life came to an end
don't be ashamed to move along
but if you loved me here, my friends
oh, won't you help me when I'm gone?

Don't pretend I was never there
because I'm still alive somewhere
but please don't hang me on your wall
if you won't pray for me at all

So if you care for me my friends
then please don't let your praying end
cause even if I'm in heaven now
someone else could use them anyhow

I've got a heavy debt to pay
have you any Water for my grave?
and if you can't visit my bones
please pray for me right from your homes

and if you'd visit me on earth
remember me for what it's worth
cause I may be suffering till I pay
so, please don't leave me alone that way

So don't go on in misery
And don't lament what couldn't be
because in heav'n I hope we'll meet
but until then, just pray for me

MyrnaM · « **Reply #1 on:** July 10, 2010, 07:45:28 PM »

Now that is a poem I can understand, and it is beautiful!

Did you compose it Dulcamara?

MaterDominici · « **Reply #2 on:** July 10, 2010, 08:35:48 PM »

:applause: :applause: :applause:

Yes, I believe she's posted it before. :scratchchin:

Dulcamara · « **Reply #3 on:** July 10, 2010, 08:46:32 PM »

Yes, I did compose it. Thank you for your compliments. And yes, I posted it before. (Twice?) I like to post it during the month of the Poor Souls, just as a reminder. :wink:

But what I would like to do (as with another of the poems I posted) is a little exercise in critical thinking...

I am inviting everyone, for a moment, even if you liked it, to put aside all good manners, and to look at the poem again, and see if you can tell me what about it is actually good, and what about it is actually bad.

I'll give you a hint... unlike with "So You Thought", much of what's wrong with this one is wrong in a slightly different way. Can you tell if it's different in a good way, or a bad way?

Feel free also to tell me honestly how you think it is better or worse than the others I posted. I would like to see if everyone can pinpoint the good and bad in these two poems.