The woman sounds like a full-blown feminαzι. You can’t run a family with a wife like this.
However, what option is there, short of walking out the door? Practically, can you talk to her family/friends and see if they agree that she’s unreasonable? She needs an intervention. Women do respond to social pressures.
You also have to pray like your life depended on it. The devil is trying to destroy another family. He’s good at it. But God's grace, and your power as head of the family, is more powerful.
Are you going to the sacraments regularly? If not, then God can allow the devil to cause chaos in punishment for your lukewarmenss. If so, then you have to forgive your wife and pray.
If the family is all on her side, then only Our Lady can help.