Dyed hair? (Unnatural or natural?)
Multiple hair colors or color streaks?
Piercings? (other than earlobes)
Tattoos?
Should men have an earring in one ear or both ears or none?
Should women have nose studs? (Yuck)

I've seen people with these at my SSPX

Hesitating backlash, I would say no. I've seen tattoos on people in remembrance of loved ones, which I think are a different story, but on the most part I think we should resist modern trends. I sincerely doubt they lead to any good. 

Is this satire?

Yes.  

I wrote the above. TLDR: Men should NEVER have any piercings or have dyed hair or wear a wig; women should only have pierced earlobes, and only wear dyed hair and wigs that are natural colors (i.e. no militant man-hating lesbian colors like purple or fire-engine red). Men who have been in the service can have a tattoo related to their time in the service as well as biker-type guys and hard blue collar laborers but Women should NEVER have ANY tattoos whatsoever. It totally degrades them and makes them look absolutely trashy.

Just curious.  In your opinion, why are men in the military and biker guys allowed tattoos?

Would you not agree that once they are traditional Catholics, people should not actively get any of these?

Yes. Maybe people of certain ethnicity may get little girl’s ears pierced. 

Just curious.  In your opinion, why are men in the military and biker guys allowed tattoos?

Because it has been a traditional custom for men in the military (especially in the Navy) to get tattoos (just look at Popeye The Sailor Man as an animated example with the Navy anchor tattoo on the upper arm) whether they tattoo the number of their military unit on them or the Marine slogan  "Semper Fi", tattoos worn by men in the military goes back as far as tattoos themselves (warrior men in Eastern cultures wore them as symbols near and dear to their hearts and Maori men wear them on their faces as part of a warrior tradition). 

Biker Men also have a tradition of wearing tattoos and living by their biker-code lifestyles (although I don't approve of their lifestyles, nonetheless, their tattoo custom suits them) the same as gang members (again, I don't approve of gang member behavior but tattoos suit their culture). Some cultures that are good wear tattoos (e.g. military men; eastern warriors) while other cultures that wear them are bad (e.g. gang members; bikers). 

So what?  Why'd you post this anonymously?

Maybe you should be worried about obtaining an actual spine before you worry about other people's tats, etc... While you are preoccupied with the externals of others, you are neglecting your own interior.  Traddieland in a nutshell, unfortunately.

Godspeed to you and yours.

SSPX tends to be more lax hence the questions on this forum to gage tradition Catholics consensus. Also anonymity does not equal cowardice. The internet doesn't have to be personal.

 I have also read that Eastern Christians would get a Cross tattoo on their wrists when under Islamic persecution so that they would not be able to deny being Christian, therefore less likely to apostasize, and it would also allow entrance into churches to weed out non-Christians

I know a Maronite priest who has one of these. I thought it was kind of strange until I read your post. He was born and raised in Lebanon.