How can a group of 5 people make 95 people feel "out in the cold"? They're the small minority, not the families. Frankly, the families could ignore the hotsy-totsies and not miss a beat.
How can people become more snobbish and exclusionary? And where did you come up with those numbers? Only 5 people attend the functions the OP is talking about?
Haven't you complained of the lack of social life at your chapel? Isn't that a reason you have given for establishing cathinfo?
No, I don't believe it's 5 exactly, but I also don't think it's a tiny chapel of 100 parishioners. 200 or 250 is more average.
Yes, there is a lack of social life, but that's more because of the dispersed nature of trads, the lack of good "friend material" for integral "live your Catholic Faith during the week" type (also known as "serious") Catholics, cultural divides, plus general lack of numbers. Even among the good Catholics at our chapel, many are older -- even the other families we know. It's hard to be super close to a family that is 1 hour away, that already has children in college when your oldest is in 2nd grade.
All the families our age tend to move away. I can't blame them -- we don't have a school here. And very few are willing/able to homeschool, it seems.
For example, we're not ga-ga over babies anymore. Babies are old hat for us. Similarly, these older families aren't fascinated by the "2nd grader" stage -- they've been there, done that, several times over. They're busy guiding their teens right now through job fairs, college prep, etc. -- which seems an eternity away for us right now.
Individual families can speak with and make friends with whomever they wish -- and they can arrange all sorts of get-togethers on their own.
I have often said in the past that most trad Catholics would have a hard time meeting their friendship needs locally. A few might be lucky, but most are not. Most need the Internet.
There can't be more than 5% of the parishioners that are "well heeled". That would go against common sense. It's difficult to become and stay rich, especially today.
And it's hard for them to be anything other than a SMALL minority, considering that each FAMILY adds considerable "bulk" to the number of non-rich.