Send CathInfo's owner Matthew a gift from his Amazon wish list:
https://www.amazon.com/hz/wishlist/ls/25M2B8RERL1UO

Author Topic: Marrying in this day in age  (Read 4706 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Offline AMDGJMJ

  • Sr. Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 3601
  • Reputation: +2205/-83
  • Gender: Female
Re: Marrying in this day in age
« Reply #15 on: April 26, 2017, 02:20:26 PM »
  • Thanks!1
  • No Thanks!0
  • I don't know about the whole make sure your potential spouse is a devout Catholic thing. Simply because there are so few devout Catholics in the world if everyone followed that advice almost nobody would get married. There are only around a million traditional Catholics in the world, but how many of them are devout? Maybe a hundred thousand. And of those, how many are single and looking to get married? Maybe twenty thousand. So if everyone only considered marrying devout Catholics, we would have at most twenty thousand people getting married and everyone else would remain single.
    The primary purpose of the Sacrament of Matrimony is the begetting raising of children to be saints.  
    Since bringing children up to be devout is the duty of Catholic parents, one would think that it would naturally then follow that anyone considering marriage would want a devout spouse to help them in this great responsibility.   :)
    "Jesus, Meek and Humble of Heart, make my heart like unto Thine!"

    http://whoshallfindavaliantwoman.blogspot.com/

    Offline AMDGJMJ

    • Sr. Member
    • ****
    • Posts: 3601
    • Reputation: +2205/-83
    • Gender: Female
    Re: Marrying in this day in age
    « Reply #16 on: April 26, 2017, 02:21:26 PM »
  • Thanks!1
  • No Thanks!0
  • But there are almost no devout Catholics in the world who are looking for marriage partners. Sure, it would be better to marry a devout Catholic, but since there are so few available, either nine-tenths of traditional Catholics will never marry and there will be no next generation, or they will have to settle for a non-devout Catholic.
    You might be amazed to find out just how many devout traditional Catholics are out there, many of whom have determined that they are called to the married state.   :)
    "Jesus, Meek and Humble of Heart, make my heart like unto Thine!"

    http://whoshallfindavaliantwoman.blogspot.com/


    Offline AMDGJMJ

    • Sr. Member
    • ****
    • Posts: 3601
    • Reputation: +2205/-83
    • Gender: Female
    Re: Marrying in this day in age
    « Reply #17 on: April 26, 2017, 02:24:08 PM »
  • Thanks!0
  • No Thanks!0
  • This advice reminds me of the advice of some priests that no man should ever consider dating unless he is rich enough to own his own house and support a large family without the wife working. Sure it would be better if these conditions are met, but in the real world if this advice was followed, almost nobody would ever get married.
    I don't know about everyone else, but I would rather have a poor husband who devout Catholic, than a rich one who was not devout.
    The Holy Family was poor, and many saintly families have also been poor...  Yet, there are rarely saintly families when the parents are not devout...
    "Jesus, Meek and Humble of Heart, make my heart like unto Thine!"

    http://whoshallfindavaliantwoman.blogspot.com/

    Änσnymσus

    • Guest
    Re: Marrying in this day in age
    « Reply #18 on: April 26, 2017, 03:38:38 PM »
  • Thanks!0
  • No Thanks!0
  • What if you marry a non - Catholic when you are a young, fallen away Catholic and then revert to the Faith after having children but your spouse keeps as a non Catholic?

    That is a very sad fate indeed. Probably one of the worst long time crosses to bear.

    Änσnymσus

    • Guest
    Re: Marrying in this day in age
    « Reply #19 on: April 26, 2017, 03:40:37 PM »
  • Thanks!0
  • No Thanks!0
  • It is a waste of time to marry someone who is not pious. The pious and the non-pious would not have the same priorities in life. It would lead to marital friction and could lead to eventual damnation for the spouses and children. You can't have a pious father and a frivolous mother or vice-versa because it leads to mixed messages being given to the children. The non-pious parent will often consciously and unconsciously undermine the religious training of the children by indulging in world-ling behaviors such as watching disgusting movies and going to places of sin such as modern beaches. 


    Änσnymσus

    • Guest
    Re: Marrying in this day in age
    « Reply #20 on: April 26, 2017, 04:29:17 PM »
  • Thanks!0
  • No Thanks!0
  • It is a waste of time to marry someone who is not pious. The pious and the non-pious would not have the same priorities in life. It would lead to marital friction and could lead to eventual damnation for the spouses and children. You can't have a pious father and a frivolous mother or vice-versa because it leads to mixed messages being given to the children. The non-pious parent will often consciously and unconsciously undermine the religious training of the children by indulging in world-ling behaviors such as watching disgusting movies and going to places of sin such as modern beaches.
    Call me a cynic, but the older I get, the more thankful I am for having never married.  

    A good friend of mine married a non-practicing Protestant.  He kept the promise to have all the children God sent, and didn't prevent the rest of his large family from hearing Mass, receiving the Sacraments, and learning the catechism.  Every last one of the children dropped the Faith as soon as they turned 18, despite attendance at a traditional chapel and school. The numerous grandchildren are illegitimate with only three baptized.  Dad stayed home on Sundays and watched porn.  

    In my 50+ years in this world, I have never been to a wedding, traditional Catholic or otherwise, that did not end in divorce or disaster.  
    Pray, but there's nothing else to be done without losing your soul.  

    In the words of Bishop Williamson, "The problem is insoluble." [E.C. 510]  All you can do is to remain a faithful Catholic.  Saving your own soul takes priority over those of your spouse and children.  

    "Wipe the dust off your shoes," and ask Our Lady to show you what to do with the remainder of your life.  

    Änσnymσus

    • Guest
    Re: Marrying in this day in age
    « Reply #21 on: April 26, 2017, 06:23:23 PM »
  • Thanks!0
  • No Thanks!0
  • What can be done?  First of all, IF your spouse lied to you before the marriage.  You must prove.  Was their someone else and she did not speak of and never said, is lying to you.  You would have to prove a lie.  Testimonies from those who know her.  And always, pray for her, pray for her to amend her sins.  As Catholics, we believe in the forgiveness of sin.  

    MY brother-in-law did this to my sister.  He was a ɧoɱosɛҳųαƖ before, during the marriage and my sister had no idea.  That is an invalid marriage and family members testified that they knew it and said nothing to my sister. That marriage lasted 12 years.  Very Sad and she has herpes for the rest of her life.

    Änσnymσus

    • Guest
    Re: Marrying in this day in age
    « Reply #22 on: April 26, 2017, 06:30:19 PM »
  • Thanks!0
  • No Thanks!0
  • What should a Trad Catholic do if he marries in the Church but later, his wife divorces him without fault?

    The question of fault is not the issue here. He must remain faithful to his marriage vows and to her. He remains faithful to her by continuing to pray and make sacrifice for her.

     In this day in age, How do you assure that Marriage is lifelong when the civil laws allow divorce so easily?  I believe that divorce ought to be banned by the civil authorities.

    We live in a pagan ambience with a pagan/masonic government, so divorce will not be banned in the foreseeable future. Neither can we be reassured that marriage is lifelong, but as Matthew and AMDG have pointed out, it is essential to marry a devout Catholic who we decide has all the signs that she keeps the laws of God and of His Church, without compromise.

    Plus you have Jorge Bergoglio's easy annulment mills to make matters worse. What ought a trad man who has become a victim to this do?

    The easy annulment mill is not the creation of Francis. I don't know the dates but easy annulment has been around for about 30 years.

    He must continue in his responsibility to his wife (she is still his wife in God's eyes) and their children to the best of his abilities. 
    Regarding what somebody said here on this thread, it is not true that it's impossible to find a devout Catholic spouse. There are many here on this site who seek out spouses. My own children who were seeking devout Catholic spouses found them, not without a long search, but they are there. They only need to be brought together. I remember a particular SSPX priest saying that we need to help to bring these people together. I don't know what he had in mind but there is certainly a need there, though not insurmountable. 


    Offline Nadir

    • Hero Member
    • *****
    • Posts: 11934
    • Reputation: +7292/-500
    • Gender: Female
    Re: Marrying in this day in age
    « Reply #23 on: April 26, 2017, 06:31:28 PM »
  • Thanks!1
  • No Thanks!0
  • The above post in blue replies is Nadir
    Help of Christians, guard our land from assault or inward stain,
    Let it be what God has planned, His new Eden where You reign.

    +RIP 2024

    Änσnymσus

    • Guest
    Re: Marrying in this day in age
    « Reply #24 on: April 26, 2017, 07:04:14 PM »
  • Thanks!0
  • No Thanks!0
  • Regarding what somebody said here on this thread, it is not true that it's impossible to find a devout Catholic spouse. There are many here on this site who seek out spouses. My own children who were seeking devout Catholic spouses found them, not without a long search, but they are there. They only need to be brought together. I remember a particular SSPX priest saying that we need to help to bring these people together. I don't know what he had in mind but there is certainly a need there, though not insurmountable.
    This... :cheers:

    Änσnymσus

    • Guest
    Re: Marrying in this day in age
    « Reply #25 on: April 26, 2017, 09:15:15 PM »
  • Thanks!0
  • No Thanks!0
  • What if you marry a non - Catholic when you are a young, fallen away Catholic and then revert to the Faith after having children but your spouse keeps as a non Catholic?

    That is a very sad fate indeed. Probably one of the worst long time crosses to bear.
    That happened to me. But after TWENTY years he was given the grace to convert. What held him back the longest was the ingrained protestant aversion to devotion to Our Lady. Then suddenly one day in prayer he just decided to give that problem over to Christ to fix, and thereafter it stopped impeding him entirely. Now he has a strong devotion to Our Lady, especially as Our Lady of Fatima. And this man was from a Baptist "all Catholics are idolaters who are going to Hell" background. I cry now when I see him praying the rosary. Miracles do happen.


    Offline Kephapaulos

    • Full Member
    • ***
    • Posts: 1880
    • Reputation: +486/-19
    • Gender: Male
    Re: Marrying in this day in age
    « Reply #26 on: April 27, 2017, 02:02:59 AM »
  • Thanks!1
  • No Thanks!0
  • Regarding what somebody said here on this thread, it is not true that it's impossible to find a devout Catholic spouse. There are many here on this site who seek out spouses. My own children who were seeking devout Catholic spouses found them, not without a long search, but they are there. They only need to be brought together. I remember a particular SSPX priest saying that we need to help to bring these people together. I don't know what he had in mind but there is certainly a need there, though not insurmountable.
    I hope to find a good Catholic spouse myself one day if God so wills, but I know that I need to finish my master degree and get a better job next year. I know also that good Catholic women do exist other parts of the country. In my neck of the woods, in spite of the "conservativism" of some women, it is neutralized by liberalism. 
    "Non nobis, Domine, non nobis; sed nomini tuo da gloriam..." (Ps. 113:9)

    Offline AMDGJMJ

    • Sr. Member
    • ****
    • Posts: 3601
    • Reputation: +2205/-83
    • Gender: Female
    Re: Marrying in this day in age
    « Reply #27 on: April 27, 2017, 06:38:16 AM »
  • Thanks!1
  • No Thanks!0
  • I hope to find a good Catholic spouse myself one day if God so wills, but I know that I need to finish my master degree and get a better job next year. I know also that good Catholic women do exist other parts of the country. In my neck of the woods, in spite of the "conservativism" of some women, it is neutralized by liberalism.
    It is sad to see how many traditional Catholics there are out there who claim to be Catholic but who are not really pious and follow the ways of the world, the flesh or the devil...  Sometimes I wish my parents had become traditional Catholics with me because then they could help me choose a proper spouse.  I always seem to misjudge good people for bad and bad people for good, and I don't really trust myself to make accurate assessments about people anymore...   :-[

    You seem to have a good heart, and to be trying hard to prepare yourself rightly for marriage.  I think that most traditional Catholic women would appreciate that.  Keep it up and God will surely help you to find a good and pious spouse if marriage is to be your vocation.  

    Please pray for me that I chose rightly according to God's will...  You in turn shall be in my prayers...   :)
    "Jesus, Meek and Humble of Heart, make my heart like unto Thine!"

    http://whoshallfindavaliantwoman.blogspot.com/

    Änσnymσus

    • Guest
    Re: Marrying in this day in age
    « Reply #28 on: April 27, 2017, 05:37:26 PM »
  • Thanks!0
  • No Thanks!0
  • You only get once chance... unless you become a widower. So, if you marry someone who divorces you later, that's it. Put up with it.

    "His disciples say unto him: If the case of a man with his wife be so, it is not expedient to marry." Matthew 19:10

    Yes divorce should be outlawed.. that has always been the teaching of the Church.

    If you don't want to become a victim.. don't marry, or choose very wisely.
     
    i say Dont marry
    it takes 2 people fully committed to Christ and ea other to make it work and i myself don't see much of that

    Offline AMDGJMJ

    • Sr. Member
    • ****
    • Posts: 3601
    • Reputation: +2205/-83
    • Gender: Female
    Re: Marrying in this day in age
    « Reply #29 on: April 28, 2017, 06:30:30 AM »
  • Thanks!0
  • No Thanks!0
  • i say Dont marry
    it takes 2 people fully committed to Christ and ea other to make it work and i myself don't see much of that
    I think that we need to remember that everyone has their vocation in life...
    Just because we are called to a particular state does not mean that everyone else is also...
    The saints say that God calls each person to a particular life because that life would be the most efficient way for them to save their soul.  Yet, anyone can chose another life which will not be as beneficial to their soul and a harder course to heaven.  Hence, if a person is called to the married life, he should try his best to enter into the married life.  While if a person is called to the religious life or single life he should make an effort to remain faithful to whichever of those lives which God has chosen for him.
    That being said...  The most esteemed Father Faber says that people leading a devout life in the married life are not as common as they should be:  http://whoshallfindavaliantwoman.blogspot.com/2015/09/as-rare-as-white-fly.html  But, such a life is certainly possible if it is one's vocation, and as long as one puts serving God properly above all else!  :)
    "Jesus, Meek and Humble of Heart, make my heart like unto Thine!"

    http://whoshallfindavaliantwoman.blogspot.com/