[Änσnymσus]

There seem to be a lot of threads about how to stop engaging in the marital act without violating your vows.

Are there a lot of frigid wives on this forum?  I don't understand why any woman would want to stop.  I'm a married woman and the physical aspect of the relationship is very comforting and wonderful even at my old age.  I'm glad my husband can find something appealing in my fat, aged body!  He would fall into a life of habitual sin if I denied him.  Why would I want to do that to him?

[Änσnymσus]

Why do you assume it is the wife that wants to stop?

[ggreg]

Why would I want to do that to him?

You wouldn't but you are happily married and have a balanced mind and a non-obsessive personality.  Never underestimate the power of stupid people in small groups.

[ggreg]

Why do you assume it is the wife that wants to stop?

Probably because she is married to a normal healthy man and knows other normal healthy married men.  Now, sure, there are exceptional saints and very holy couples who after a great deal of discernment, prudent thought and spiritual direction might take this step.  But dollars to donuts none of them are hanging around on Internet forums looking for advice or dishing it out.  I bet they also are VERY discreet about it because of their prudent concern that some people might misinterpret it as a slight on their own marriage or that post menopausal sex was "lustful"

If some rare couple are contemplating making this sacrifice in the right spirit (and not because of latent ɧoɱosɛҳųαƖity or a unbalanced disgust of a natural act in its proper setting, then they are busy with praying, good works, assisting a masses, sewing scapulars, fostering children and a hundred other things.  Any priest guiding them would make sure that this was an appropriate sacrifice for a very spiritually mature and saintly couple.  Plenty can go disastrously wrong otherwise.

My guess is that a lot of the people promoting sexless marriages are not even married.  Aesop was warning his readers about people like that 3000 years ago.

[Änσnymσus]

Because not long ago a woman did admit several times on this forum she wanted that part of her marriage to end.  There was a recent thread about Josephite marriages that I think was started by a man but I'm not talking about that.  I just noticed several threads in the past 6 months on this subject.  

I'm just pointing out that not all older women hate that part of marriage.  And it doesn't mean that I am lustful.  

[Mithrandylan]

Because not long ago a woman did admit several times on this forum she wanted that part of her marriage to end.  There was a recent thread about Josephite marriages that I think was started by a man but I'm not talking about that.  I just noticed several threads in the past 6 months on this subject.  

I'm just pointing out that not all older women hate that part of marriage.  And it doesn't mean that I am lustful.  

I remember that, though I had forgotten.  That was very odd, she created her account (seemingly) for the very purpose to announce that she was a newlywed and was emotionally ruined (my words, not hers) by the marital debt.  It was disturbing, and I do wonder if that person was real.  

[Änσnymσus]

So I just found this sub-forum and I don't know how anyone keeps track of things here.  Guests quote other guests.....lol.

[Änσnymσus]

So I just found this sub-forum and I don't know how anyone keeps track of things here.  Guests quote other guests.....lol.

WHOA...this is 2Vermont....posts automatically become anonymous here??? I have never seen anything like that before.

[Änσnymσus]

It was pretty common for Catholics to taper off performance of the marital act in old age - probably because procreation was seen as the primary end of the act.  Only recently has the unitive aspect begun to overshadow it.  So they would give up what was earthly for those things that are spiritual in preparation for the end of their lives.  No, they're not mutually exclusive concepts, but any sacrifice of worldly goods for love of God will draw us closer to Him.

[Änσnymσus]

It was pretty common for Catholics to taper off performance of the marital act in old age

How could you possibly know this?

[parentsfortruth]

It was pretty common for Catholics to taper off performance of the marital act in old age

How could you possibly know this?

 :scratchchin:

I was thinking the same thing.

[Änσnymσus]

It was pretty common for Catholics to taper off performance of the marital act in old age

How could you possibly know this?

That the concept of marital celibacy used to be more common once child-bearing years had passed?  I'm not sure how to approach this.  Do you want book references or something?

[Änσnymσus]

It was pretty common for Catholics to taper off performance of the marital act in old age

How could you possibly know this?

That the concept of marital celibacy used to be more common once child-bearing years had passed?  I'm not sure how to approach this.  Do you want book references or something?

You made a general claim about the sex lives of traditional Catholics.  That's pretty weird.

[Änσnymσus]

You made a general claim about the sex lives of traditional Catholics.  That's pretty weird.

Even if I did that, which I didn't, that wouldn't be too weird.  For example: traditional Catholics don't use contraception.  That's a claim about the sex lives of trads.  It's also not weird.  What I said was that it was pretty common.  That doesn't imply everyone, or even a majority: but it was much more common.  Nowadays people think they need that they even need to resort to pharmaceuticals to keep things going when in our grandparents' generation they would have taken that as a sign to give marital celebacy a go.

Not weird at all.

[wallflower]

2Vermont, this is an anonymous forum so people can ask sensitive questions without being embarrassed. Or, as it happens, troll others without being exposed.

You just have to click the button that says "DO NOT post this Anonymously" to post as yourself as some of us prefer. It's right above the reply button.