I have a question about how to deal with temptations during engagement and if there is potentially any sin in what I am doing. If it makes any difference, I am female. We are long distance and following as much as we can traditional courtship (obviously the long distance makes that hard but let's put it this way, we don't go off alone or anything, ever) so there is no risk of improper things happening. My fiance is very good and would never do anything to put me or him at risk of sin. Neither do I put him at risk.
However, I do have a problem with intrusive thoughts and worry they could possibly be sinful. I'm trying to be as discreet as possible in describing this here. I very much look forward to family life, having children, taking care of the home and sharing my life with him. I mean all that in the most innocent way possible. I also know that there is a physical side to marriage and while I do not dwell on it I am aware of it and that awareness makes me very happy. Not for impure reasons but because I know it is God's plan for bringing children into the world and bringing spouses closer together. I also feel very happy about the thought of being able to hug, hold hands, etc.
Basically, I don't purposely think about these things for impure reasons. I know that would be a mortal sin. Sometimes though, without deliberately trying to think of them, I do get thoughts about it, and I try to push them away, but I do not have revulsion towards them like I would for a typical impure thought. I push them away because I am afraid they might be an occasion of sin.
Is there something wrong with this? Also, is it wrong to think about innocent things if you know that they might ignite thoughts that could be occasions of sin? Short of never thinking about him, I don't know how I can completely avoid it!
Alright, reading over this I sound like a scrupulous person, but still, maybe someone can set my mind at ease if that is the case.