Rejection is the worst!  If anyone knows betrayal, rejection it is Christ.  I have a friend who lost her husband and she thought she was hurting til a Priest told her, there is something worse, rejection.  I was rejected and it hurt real deep!  To me it was like what Christ went through with mockery and slapping.  I was blessed to have the person who hurt me to be remorseful.  It took me even then a long time to feel better.  I tried many things, reading spiritual books on humility, even though you would think that is not for people like us.  A very good traditional priest and well known who died, was the one who heard the confession of the one who hurt me so!  He told me, to pray 3 rosaries a day.  I was doing 3 when I could already, but I find that doing 3 = to the Divine Office.  I find that when I do, I have peace and when I don't the devil tempts me with awful thoughts of what I went through.  It is like the devil wants me to have "Pity parties", feeling sorry for myself.  I still have cries every know and then, but I must think of things to Thank God for, and to be a true, honest to goodness Catholic, I know I must pray for the strength and understanding of God's ways to get me to that point.  Forgiving is not instanious (sp) for we are human, but with God's help of His Son's Precious Blood in all the sacraments, forgiving is supernatural, not so much of man's ways, but God's way.  You need supernatural, and beg for it.  I certainly feel with you for you did not receive remorse and consolation is a big human desire.  Persevere.

I struggle with the same issue.  There are two things that help me work through the problem.  First I consider Christ on the Cross "Forgive them for they know not what they do."  If Jesus could forgive, then who am I not to?  The Christian's task is to take up our Cross and follow Him in every way.

Second, it is Christ's admonition in the Gospels that we must forgive.  We will be forgiven at our Judgment according to the measure we forgive others.  Scary. If for no other reason do it for yourself.  You don't have to feel it.  That may or may not come later.  Forgiveness is an act of the will.

In forgiving we are not letting people off the hook.  They are still on GOD'S hook. Justice is for him to dispense, not us.

If you think of the person who wronged you as being spiritually sick, ask yourself how you can be angry at a sick person?  

The prayer of St. Francis of Assisi is helpful too.

How many people have had this experience among "trads"?

I'm the OP--thanks for all the suggestions.  I do appreciate it very much.

Don't forget that holding a grudge is a sin of pride run amok!  
Analyze the situation very carefully and pray for guidance.
Prayer and love of Our Lord are the keys to forgiving for the right reasons.
It's tough!  I know it!

While pride may be involved in some cases, it may not in others. It rather seems to me that the perpetrators of the injustice may well be the ones suffering from pride or ego problems. Aggrieved victims of divorce or other injustices in the workplace or elsewhere most probably don't have pride as the major item to counter. I know very little about theology but I have heard of the term just/justified anger. Prolonged bitterness and brooding may well be an aberration/exaggeration of this. However, one should try and overcome this by prayer and diversion of thought to other things. Yes, IT'S TOUGH!!!!