Catholic Info
Traditional Catholic Faith => Anσnymσus Posts Allowed => Topic started by: Änσnymσus on October 20, 2022, 10:30:35 PM
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I’m a young convert to the Faith.( I’m living with my parents while I finish university) My parents are very anti-Catholic and won’t allow me to attend Mass. I’m over 18 so they can’t legally stop me. However, I want to do my best to honor God while also honoring my parents. I could call the police( theyd talk to my parents and take care of things) but as I said, I want to do my best to honor them.
What should I do?
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I’m a young convert to the Faith.( I’m living with my parents while I finish university) My parents are very anti-Catholic and won’t allow me to attend Mass. I’m over 18 so they can’t legally stop me. However, I want to do my best to honor God while also honoring my parents. I could call the police( theyd talk to my parents and take care of things) but as I said, I want to do my best to honor them.
What should I do?
You're not a minor anymore, what exactly would or could they do if you did attend Mass?
Honoring God is more important than honoring your parents, if a conflict exists between the two.
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I’m a young convert to the Faith.( I’m living with my parents while I finish university) My parents are very anti-Catholic and won’t allow me to attend Mass. I’m over 18 so they can’t legally stop me. However, I want to do my best to honor God while also honoring my parents. I could call the police( theyd talk to my parents and take care of things) but as I said, I want to do my best to honor them.
What should I do?
:confused: You have to call the police to have a conversation with your parents?
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:confused: You have to call the police to have a conversation with your parents?
OP here. Yes. I’ve had many conversations with them myself and at times they’ve even made threats against my life. The police would talk sense into them
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OP here. Yes. I’ve had many conversations with them myself and at times they’ve even made threats against my life. The police would talk sense into them
What religion are your parents?
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This is testing credibility. I don't believe it. Do you have siblings and other relatives?
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This is testing credibility. I don't believe it. Do you have siblings and other relatives?
OP here. Matthew knows who I am and can confirm. My siblings are too young to be of help and my relatives are like my parents
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Why are they so anti-Catholic?
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Why are they so anti-Catholic?
OP here. Many reasons( they hate the notion of the Trinity, they view Catholics as idol worshippers for worshipping Christ who they view as a mere man, they think the Church is corrupt, etc)
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Catholicism is a good religion in tune with the good and the virtues associated with it. Plato and Aristotle discussed the good, but they have no witnesses like the Apostles. The apostolic testimony of the faith is one of the most powerful records in history, and Jesus taught the Our Father which is the best prayer known to mankind.
As evidence, look at the prayers and the Apostle's Creed. Someone may say they don't believe it, but if they say it's "bad", I would challenge them that they don't know what's good.
What's good about not believing in the Trinity? How is that good? This is only to suggest a Socratic pastoral approach, etc.
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What religion are your parents?
Are they Jehova’s Witnesses? They sound like it.
Have you spoken to a priest? Been baptised? Considered becoming self supporting, delaying your uni studies? A little more detail about yourself would be helpful.
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If the New Testament account of Jesus is true, how is it that it is bad? Is it not good?
And how does anybody presume they know it's not true. Nobody on Earth knows that it's not true. They simply say that it's not true or that it doesn't suit them.
You can be Catholic and join the Marines, for example. How is that not good? (But do not take a "Covid" vaccine) Endeavor to persevere. Nitimini perseverare.
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At no point does OP say that his parents are Christian. From the way he talks they could be Muslim or Jew or rabid protestants, none of whom will accept the New Testament.
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Pray the rosary. All will be fine.
If you're talking about going to a Novus Ordo "mass" you have no obligation to go.
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I’m a young convert to the Faith.( I’m living with my parents while I finish university) My parents are very anti-Catholic and won’t allow me to attend Mass. I’m over 18 so they can’t legally stop me. However, I want to do my best to honor God while also honoring my parents. I could call the police( theyd talk to my parents and take care of things) but as I said, I want to do my best to honor them.
What should I do?
I can empathize with you. I desired and tried to be a true Catholic and attend the True Mass exclusively when I was 15 but my parents believed that the traditional Catholic movement was heretical and schismatic (they are conservative novus ordo). My parents told me that I could not live with them if I did not attend the novus ordo because I would be a bad example for my younger siblings.
Being a minor, I had no choice but to go with them until I was 18 though eventually I decided that even if I had to go with them I did not have to participate in the services. This created an uproar in my family and parish because I was a member of three parish choirs and our family was very well known. Many people gave my parents videos and books for me to read and I respectfully watched and read them. I was even "put on trial" by their local pastor but I had answers that even he couldn't answer and was not familiar with.
Just about as soon as I turned 18 I went to live with a traditional Catholic family I knew. I helped tutor their youngest two children and helped work on their farm in return for room, board and access to the traditional Mass. After 2 years my parents asked me to come back home. Their farm had picked up in business and they were having a hard time finding good help. They made the concession that I would not have to go to the novus ordo and that they would even allow me to borrow a car to drive to Mass until I was able to purchase my own.
The biggest thing is to remember that we know not the day nor the hour that God will take us from this life. So, it is best to act now as we would if today were our last.
I would highly encourage you to make an effort to attend the traditional Mass and obtain the Sacraments if you can in any way. My parents respect my decision about the Faith even though they disagree and I don't think that they feel dishonored. In fact, if you think about it, by honoring God and serving Him first we truly honor our parents and their memory in the best way.
Hang in there! We are all here for you! Even if anonymously... ;)
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I converted when I was really young (a minor) and my family didn't allow me to go to church either. I just insisted because nothing is more important than your salvation and worshipping God, and eventually over so many years by God's grace, they accepted the fact and now they would drive me over an hour to Mass and cook non meat dish on Fridays. But of course my family wouldn't threaten to kill me either so that could be different for you. I don't think they would actually kill you though.
Maybe a good way to do it is to go to Masses still but then perhaps do some nice things for them, bring them little gifts, cook them a nice meals, tell them you love them and prayed for them at church and help out with what they need on Sundays after Masses. Also ask for going to Mass everyday and maybe they'll back down to allow you to go to one each week ;)
Above all, pray for them, and do not be afraid of sacrifices you need to do because God will reward you.
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I’m a young convert to the Faith.( I’m living with my parents while I finish university) My parents are very anti-Catholic and won’t allow me to attend Mass. I’m over 18 so they can’t legally stop me. However, I want to do my best to honor God while also honoring my parents. I could call the police( theyd talk to my parents and take care of things) but as I said, I want to do my best to honor them.
What should I do?
Have you spoken with a local traditional priest? Certainly your parents are not aware of what you do 24/7, I would suggest trying to schedule a meeting on a weekday or Saturday to explain your situation. Perhaps you could find a Catholic of the same sex that you could live with while attending university?
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How exactly would they prevent you from going to Mass that you would have to call the police?
Are they kidnapping you?
If you don't have your own car and you called for an Uber to go to Mass, what would they do?
You do not have an obligation to obey them where it comes to not going to Mass. It is not to dishonor your parents to disobey them. Reason we honor them is that they reflect and extend God's authority. But then they command something that contravenes God's authority (His command to attend Mass on Sundays), that chain of command is broken and the command is not legitimate.
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I grew up in the Novus Ordo, attending their schools from first grade through high school. I always thought there must be something wrong with me because I was unmoved, uninspired by all the masses I had to sit through.
I turned my back on what I thought was the Catholic church by my late teens.
I still had a thirst for God and explored a number of protestant churches in my twenties.
Then something totally unexpected happened. In my thirties a coworker invited me to attend a Tridentine mass in Chicago. I was moved in such a way that I immediately knew this was real Catholicism.
That simple invitation, that gesture by a coworker was all it took to get me on the right path.
So, for those of you who have unbelieving relatives and friends...let them experience the true mass instead of trying to persuade them with well reasoned arguments. You can knock on a deaf man's door forever without getting a response, better to let God open their eyes and ears.
If they turn down your invitation then keep praying for them!
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When possible I’d move out and let the cards fall where they may with your parents. Let them know that you are Catholic and are obliged to obey Church teachings, let them know that you love them and leave praying that God will mend things.
If you can’t afford it, maybe try to find a good roommate to split the bills with. If you can’t afford both school and rent I’d put the college education on hold for a year or so and work double time to save up some money.
You are of age and you need to get to Mass. I’d make that a priority over education, relationship with parents, etc. God will honor your efforts!
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I’m a young convert to the Faith.( I’m living with my parents while I finish university) My parents are very anti-Catholic and won’t allow me to attend Mass. I’m over 18 so they can’t legally stop me. However, I want to do my best to honor God while also honoring my parents. I could call the police( theyd talk to my parents and take care of things) but as I said, I want to do my best to honor them.
What should I do?
There is a lot of good advice given here. But if the situation at home becomes too difficult and if you can move out, then do so. You can always do what hundreds of Traditional Catholics have done (assuming you are a man), ask for a job here: Contact Us - The Onyx Collection (https://onyxcollection.com/contact-us/) which gives them an opportunity to move and have a modest income while you get your situation stabilized.
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I’m a young convert to the Faith.( I’m living with my parents while I finish university) My parents are very anti-Catholic and won’t allow me to attend Mass. I’m over 18 so they can’t legally stop me. However, I want to do my best to honor God while also honoring my parents. I could call the police( theyd talk to my parents and take care of things) but as I said, I want to do my best to honor them.
What should I do?
My advice to you is this: don't call the police on your parents, especially not over a religious argument. The police will not understand what's going on, and from then on out you are on the polices' radar. I assume from this post that you are a woman, which complicates things a bit. If you were a man, stand up for yourself and do what you think is necessary for attending Mass. It is sinful to disobey your parents UNLESS what they are telling you to do is sinful. Preventing you from your Catholic duties is sinful; your parents are in the wrong. If you are a woman and your parents are threatening you, you are not required to speak to them about religion. Use common sense and don't talk to them about that subject. If you are unable to get away on Sunday to keep the Lord's day holy, pray in secret. The Lord knows your situation best, and will understand. God will not punish you for the actions of your parents. Viva Cristo Rey
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If possible, move out on your own.
Then you can still honor your parents and visit them, but the friction will much be less intense, since you are not seeing them everyday.
If there's not a real threat to your life, you can simply disobey them and go to mass anyway.
Avoid any talk about religion. You will diminish the occasions for fruitless and violent discussion this way.
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Meeting with a Priest would be a good idea - you can always arrange it on a day you'd be out for university anyway to not create conflict with your parents on the matter.
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You are in a difficult situation with your parents. Sometimes distance is a good thing to honor them. Sometimes an hour away isn’t always far enough. lol.
You can always work on a farm in summer in the northeast of USA. They provide housing rent free if you work for them. Most is seasonal summer work. Depending on you work, you can work year round and go to school at night. Many local community colleges are paid by the tax payers so student who are residents go for free.
What’s your major in college? Sometimes colleges are too liberal and costly in the long run.
Many young people in our area worked for people and went to school and have their own electrical, plumbing, heating, computer repairs, hair dresser, etc. businesses.
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There is a lot of good advice given here. But if the situation at home becomes too difficult and if you can move out, then do so. You can always do what hundreds of Traditional Catholics have done (assuming you are a man), ask for a job here: Contact Us - The Onyx Collection (https://onyxcollection.com/contact-us/) which gives them an opportunity to move and have a modest income while you get your situation stabilized.
I'm not sure I follow what the significance of this business is. Are you saying that "hundreds of Traditional Catholics" have asked for a job at this specific business? I see they are located in Belvue, do they have a connection to St. Marys?