I used to be novus ordo and thought just like your mother.  I'm very very  ashamed to admit it and to remember it.  The real fanatics are those who participate in the de-Catholicization of the Church, such as your mother with her mentality.  A true Catholic mother would weep for joy that her child strives so hard to be holy.
Just goes to show how UN-Catholic the novus ordo sect is.
In the Examination of Conscience (1st Commandment) I can see several instances where your mother is transgressing and should confess herself

First Commandment: I am the Lord thy God. Thou shalt not have strange gods before Me. (Including sins against Faith, Hope and Charity)

    Have I neglected the knowledge of my faith as taught in the catechism, such as the Apostles’ Creed, the Ten Commandments, the Seven Sacraments, the Our Father, etc.?
    Have I deliberately doubted or denied any of the teachings of the Church?
    Have I taken part in any non-Catholic worship?
    Am I a member of any non-Catholic religious organization, secret society or anti-Catholic group?
    Have I knowingly read any heretical, blasphemous or anti-Catholic literature?
    Have I practiced any superstitions (such as horoscopes, fortune telling, Ouija board, etc.)?
    Have I omitted religious duties or practices through motives of human respect?
    Have I recommended myself daily to God?
    Have I been faithful to my daily prayers?
    Have I abused the Sacraments in any way? Received them irreverently, e.g. Communion in the Hand without obeying the principles and the 7 rules promulgated by Paul VI as binding in this matter?
    Have I made fun of God, Our Lady, the Saints, the Church, the Sacraments, other holy things?
    Have I been guilty of great irreverence in church, e.g., conversation, behavior, or dress?
    Have I been indifferent with regard to my Catholic Faith — believing one can be saved in any religion, that all religions are equal?
    Have I presumed on God´s mercy at any time?
    Have I despaired of God´s mercy?
    Have I hated God?
    Have I given too much importance to any creature, activity, object or opinion?

How often to go?  Remember the tremendous grace that flows from this sacrament.  We should avail ourselves of as many sacraments as possible, and certainly the continuous purifcation of  our soul that frequent confession brings.  

He will reward you greatly for your love and devotion.  Keep doing what you're doing and the only voice you should listen to is His, Who calls you to His Sacred Heart.  How blessed you are that you can hear His voice and that you respond!

The answer is:  you should go to Confession as often as you need to to get back into the state of grace, but at the very least, you are required to go once a year.  The only possibly worry about going too often is that you have developed scruples, but a good confessor should be able to help you with that.

 :sad:
I used to get to Confession once a week before Mass with no problem.  Over the last five years, the time allotted has dropped from an hour or more to about 20 minutes.  The same five or six people arrive an hour early, and allow their late-coming family and friends to cut in front of them.  I have to tend to an elderly family member on Sunday morning while another hears Mass at his novus ordo parish, with the result that I cannot leave early enough to get on line.  I am also unable to stand for long periods of time, and have actually been denied a place in line while seated in a pew.  I live too far away to make an appointment after working hours. These days I get to Confession only on the off-chance there is a visiting priest so that they continue during Mass, or at a rare Resistance Mass in my area.

:sad:
I used to get to Confession once a week before Mass with no problem.  Over the last five years, the time allotted has dropped from an hour or more to about 20 minutes.  The same five or six people arrive an hour early, and allow their late-coming family and friends to cut in front of them.  I have to tend to an elderly family member on Sunday morning while another hears Mass at his novus ordo parish, with the result that I cannot leave early enough to get on line.  I am also unable to stand for long periods of time, and have actually been denied a place in line while seated in a pew.  I live too far away to make an appointment after working hours. These days I get to Confession only on the off-chance there is a visiting priest so that they continue during Mass, or at a rare Resistance Mass in my area.

The Code of Canon Law has this to say about confession;
 Can.  960 Individual and integral confession and absolution constitute the only ordinary means by which a member of the faithful conscious of grave sin is reconciled with God and the Church. Only physical or moral impossibility excuses from confession of this type; in such a case reconciliation can be obtained by other means.

If you are in a situatin where it is impossible for you to get to confession then I would recommend making the act of perfect contrition very frequently. God knows who truly loves him and who is putting on a show. All we can do is our best. God in his infinite mercy and justice will take care of the rest. I will pray for you.
   

The Code of Canon Law has this to say about confession;
 Can.  960 Individual and integral confession and absolution constitute the only ordinary means by which a member of the faithful conscious of grave sin is reconciled with God and the Church. Only physical or moral impossibility excuses from confession of this type; in such a case reconciliation can be obtained by other means.

If you are in a situatin where it is impossible for you to get to confession then I would recommend making the act of perfect contrition very frequently. God knows who truly loves him and who is putting on a show. All we can do is our best. God in his infinite mercy and justice will take care of the rest. I will pray for you.
   

The condition of impossibility is the fault of the pastor.  He is in residence beside the church.  He allows select persons to monopolize the confessional and hears about five to seven penitents in the very short time allotted.  The church bulletin says confessions are heard for 30 minutes before Mass, but they start consistently late.  Many others are turned away week after week because Mass always starts on time.  
I rarely have mortal sins to confess, but many besetting venial sins into which I'm gradually falling more often, and I find myself caring less about them.