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Author Topic: Home birth, does she have a choice?  (Read 4746 times)

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Offline St Ignatius

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Re: Home birth, does she have a choice?
« Reply #15 on: November 07, 2017, 11:51:48 AM »
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    • There's a lot more to this topic than is being discussed here... 6 of our 7 children were born at home, I  can't even begin to name all the pros that resulted from having them at home.

    Our eldest was born in a "Catholic" hospital with a doula, and it was a fight with the medical staff from beginning to end to have our wishes met.  In today's world, pregnancies are considered a "condition," not something normal.

    Our youngest was born with severe eczema and severe food allergies.  The "professional" medical world wants to just suppress the symptoms with steroids, and and not treat the cause... after nearly 2 1/2 years of using "natural" remedies, he's slowly overcoming his ailments.  Yes, we've had to resort to "modern" practices for the most severe reactions, but they were life saving procedures rather than remedies...

    I have 2 sisters who were RNs, they went to medical school with the Catholic Faith and were appalled by what's taught today... neither practice their professions any longer today due to now having families of their own. They still keep themselves informed of the medical practices as they evolve, but now spend most of their efforts in studying natural and homeopathic remedies.

    BTW, it's hell fighting the establishment regarding vaccinations... having your children at home definitely relieves a lot of the harassment that occurs when one is under the thumb of hospital doctor. 
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    Re: Home birth, does she have a choice?
    « Reply #16 on: November 07, 2017, 12:07:13 PM »
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    • Quote from: jen51 on November 07, 2017, 11:50:24 AM
    During my first delivery, if I would have been home I would have died and likely my baby also.

    This kind of scenario is not as uncommon as one might think.
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    Offline Ladislaus

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    Re: Home birth, does she have a choice?
    « Reply #17 on: November 07, 2017, 12:08:57 PM »
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    • Quote from: Jaynek on November 07, 2017, 11:21:13 AM
    It is all very well to say not to base decisions on emotion, but pregnant women are emotional.

    I was being critical of the MAN for being emotional.  ;)
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    Offline Jaynek

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    Re: Home birth, does she have a choice?
    « Reply #18 on: November 07, 2017, 12:09:54 PM »
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    • Quote from: jen51 on November 07, 2017, 11:50:24 AM
    I can tell you, having birthed babies, that anxiety level definitely is a factor in how successful or painful/problematic labor is. He is not doing her any favors by making her do something she is uncomfortable with. If she is wracked with nerves about a homebirth, I pity the poor girl during labor. If indeed she has expressed a desire to not birth at home, then you'd think the fiancé would take this into consideration. From what the OP says, his concerns are not realistic and seem very emotional and paranoid.
    I actually checked the OP specifically looking for a description of the woman's view of home birth.  I could not find it.  The post was about what the woman's friend thinks of it.
    There was no indication that the woman has expressed being uncomfortable with home birth or a preference to give birth in a hospital.  She apparently expressed nervousness about birth in general.  

    A husband ought to take into consideration his wife's views when he is making a decision that affects her, but there is no reason for him to consider his wife's friend's views.
    The OP was a one-sided description of the situation and there is no way to tell how fair it was being to the fiance. Some people in this thread are judging him without hearing his side of the story. 
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    Offline Miseremini

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    Re: Home birth, does she have a choice?
    « Reply #19 on: November 07, 2017, 12:20:01 PM »
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    • Quote from: Jaynek on November 07, 2017, 12:09:54 PM
    there is no reason for him to consider his wife's friend's views.

    The wife's friends don't have a say in the decision.... BUT.... any reasonable person/man will listen to those who actually have experience in any given situation especially when he has NONE.
    We're neglecting to honour our elders for their wisdom.
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    Offline jen51

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    Re: Home birth, does she have a choice?
    « Reply #20 on: November 07, 2017, 12:22:16 PM »
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    • Quote from: St Ignatius on November 07, 2017, 11:51:48 AM
    There's a lot more to this topic than is being discussed here... 6 of our 7 children were born at home, I  can't even begin to name all the pros that resulted from having them at home.

    Our eldest was born in a "Catholic" hospital with a doula, and it was a fight with the medical staff from beginning to end to have our wishes met.  In today's world, pregnancies are considered a "condition," not something normal.

    Our youngest was born with severe eczema and severe food allergies.  The "professional" medical world wants to just suppress the symptoms with steroids, and and not treat the cause... after nearly 2 1/2 years of using "natural" remedies, he's slowly overcoming his ailments.  Yes, we've had to resort to "modern" practices for the most severe reactions, but they were life saving procedures rather than remedies...

    I have 2 sisters who were RNs, they went to medical school with the Catholic Faith and were appalled by what's taught today... neither practice their professions any longer today due to now having families of their own. They still keep themselves informed of the medical practices as they evolve, but now spend most of their efforts in studying natural and homeopathic remedies.

    BTW, it's hell fighting the establishment regarding vaccinations... having your children at home definitely relieves a lot of the harassment that occurs when one is under the thumb of hospital doctor.
    I agree with you. My husband had to fight tooth and nail to forego the hep B vaccine in the hospital, as well as many other unnecessary "protocol".  I was beginning to be worried we would get CPS called on us. You couldn't have said it better. Preqgnancy is not a condition! It's a natural part of life! 
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    Religion clean and undefiled before God and the Father, is this: to visit the fatherless and widows in their tribulation: and to keep one's self unspotted from this world.
    ~James 1:27

    Offline Jaynek

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    Re: Home birth, does she have a choice?
    « Reply #21 on: November 07, 2017, 12:24:55 PM »
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    • Another factor to consider is that the couple is engaged and contemplating the future, not  making a decision about birth practices when actually pregnant.

    When I was engaged and first married, I was adamant that I wanted a home birth.  I felt that way through the entire first pregnancy. But when it came time for birth, the child was a footling breech presentation.  When there was a compelling reason to give up my home birth ideal, I was prepared to do so.  I think that is pretty typical.

    All we know about the fiance is his views on the subject in abstract.  We don't know how he would react to his wife expressing a strong preference for a hospital or being identified with a high risk condition.  He has not yet been in a situation in which it would be good to compromise so we cannot conclude that he is stubborn and unwilling to compromise.
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    Re: Home birth, does she have a choice?
    « Reply #22 on: November 07, 2017, 12:25:20 PM »
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    • Quote from: jen51 on November 07, 2017, 12:22:16 PM
    My husband had to fight tooth and nail to forego the hep B vaccine in the hospital, as well as many other unnecessary "protocol".

    We just told them no and that was the end of it.  I'm sure that different places have different attitudes.
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    Re: Home birth, does she have a choice?
    « Reply #23 on: November 07, 2017, 12:40:12 PM »
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    • As a woman , the man is right to have concerns.  Most hospitals are dirty and full of bacteria.  Most doctors, nurses are liberal atheists. Then they try to push drugs and c sections that aren't needed. 

    I would have chosen home with Catholic midwife.  
    Sad to say i wasn't able to get pregnant. Also, most fertility doctors are greedy quacks. 

    And now our Catholic hospital has been taken over with many enemies Jesus working there.  "St" and "our Lady of " has been removed. Or some have been renamed to secular Latin name. 

    Wake up!  As Christians , we all should be concerned. You don't really know what is in your medications. 

    And didn't the Catholic Church invent hospitals?  Better get traditional Catholic hospitals and nursing homes. 








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    Re: Home birth, does she have a choice?
    « Reply #24 on: November 07, 2017, 12:44:09 PM »
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    • Muslims are taking over hospitals and hospital chapels doctors, nurses receptionists. And they hate Catholics.   And don't be eating at diners either. 

    But produce and meat direct from farmers. 
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    Offline jen51

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    Re: Home birth, does she have a choice?
    « Reply #25 on: November 07, 2017, 12:48:03 PM »
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    • Quote from: Jaynek on November 07, 2017, 12:09:54 PM
    I actually checked the OP specifically looking for a description of the woman's view of home birth.  I could not find it.  The post was about what the woman's friend thinks of it.
    There was no indication that the woman has expressed being uncomfortable with home birth or a preference to give birth in a hospital.  She apparently expressed nervousness about birth in general.  

    A husband ought to take into consideration his wife's views when he is making a decision that affects her, but there is no reason for him to consider his wife's friend's views.
    The OP was a one-sided description of the situation and there is no way to tell how fair it was being to the fiance. Some people in this thread are judging him without hearing his side of the story.
    Yes, I tried to phrase it in a way that did not assume her thoughts. That's why I said "if". The OP did, however, make it abundantly clear that the fiancé is unmovable on this topic. No assumptions there. Therefore there's no reason to doubt that she has no say on the matter according to him. This could pose a large issue if she's terrified of the idea of a homebirth or if she has a condition that requires the hospital. 
    If her fears about birth are general and not related to which facility she births in, then so much the better. That's completely normal. I still say the OP should not offer any unsolicited advice unless it's clear that the woman's health is in danger. 
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    Religion clean and undefiled before God and the Father, is this: to visit the fatherless and widows in their tribulation: and to keep one's self unspotted from this world.
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    Offline jen51

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    Re: Home birth, does she have a choice?
    « Reply #26 on: November 07, 2017, 12:54:27 PM »
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    • Quote from: Jaynek on November 07, 2017, 12:24:55 PM

    All we know about the fiance is his views on the subject in abstract.  We don't know how he would react to his wife expressing a strong preference for a hospital or being identified with a high risk condition.  He has not yet been in a situation in which it would be good to compromise so we cannot conclude that he is stubborn and unwilling to compromise.
    That's not the way I took it. When the OP said "homebirth ONLY" I figured that pretty much settled it. Perhaps I am wrong though. 
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    Religion clean and undefiled before God and the Father, is this: to visit the fatherless and widows in their tribulation: and to keep one's self unspotted from this world.
    ~James 1:27

    Offline Jaynek

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    Re: Home birth, does she have a choice?
    « Reply #27 on: November 07, 2017, 12:55:06 PM »
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    • Quote from: jen51 on November 07, 2017, 12:48:03 PM
    Yes, I tried to phrase it in a way that did not assume her thoughts. That's why I said "if". The OP did, however, make it abundantly clear that the fiancé is unmovable on this topic. No assumptions there. Therefore there's no reason to doubt that she has no say on the matter according to him. This could pose a large issue if she's terrified of the idea of a homebirth or if she has a condition that requires the hospital.
    If her fears about birth are general and not related to which facility she births in, then so much the better. That's completely normal. I still say the OP should not offer any unsolicited advice unless it's clear that the woman's health is in danger.
    Sorry, Jen, I did not mean to sound critical of your post.  I actually upvoted it.  I was using my reply to you to make some points about this thread in general.  I completely agree with what you say about unsolicited advice.
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    Offline Jaynek

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    Re: Home birth, does she have a choice?
    « Reply #28 on: November 07, 2017, 12:59:13 PM »
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    • Quote from: jen51 on November 07, 2017, 12:54:27 PM
    That's not the way I took it. When the OP said "homebirth ONLY" I figured that pretty much settled it. Perhaps I am wrong though.
    Unmarried people often have strong opinions about birth or child raising.  It is not unusual for them to change their views when in the actual situation.  I suspect that most of us parents here have done that.
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    Offline jen51

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    Re: Home birth, does she have a choice?
    « Reply #29 on: November 07, 2017, 01:05:31 PM »
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    • Quote from: Jaynek on November 07, 2017, 12:55:06 PM
    Sorry, Jen, I did not mean to sound critical of your post.  I actually upvoted it.  I was using my reply to you to make some points about this thread in general.  I completely agree with what you say about unsolicited advice.
    No worries! I just reread my post and saw a sentence that went on the assumption she was against homebirth. So it is worthy of criticism, lol. 
    I agree that there is too much missing information, especially about how the woman feels. 
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    Religion clean and undefiled before God and the Father, is this: to visit the fatherless and widows in their tribulation: and to keep one's self unspotted from this world.
    ~James 1:27
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