I'm mostly sure I'm gonna break up with my girlfriend because we just don't really work together, I don't see us spending the rest of our lives together.
To those of you that have had break-ups, any tips on how to make it as painless as possible? I want to prevent her from thinking there's something wrong with her and blaming herself, that it just ends in good terms and we both court other people, just stuff like that. Thank you so much.
I think "ending" a courtship prospect shouldn't be quite as dramatic as a typical worldly boyfriend/girlfriend "couple" where all sorts of psychological, biological, and emotional connections are involved.
Yes, even Traditional Catholics engaging in chaste courtship would be sad when the other person decides "it's over" -- but it has to be easier than when you've been living together as a married couple, have been physically intimate in various ways (kissing, etc.) and so on.
I'm just thinking that rationality should have a much bigger piece of the total pie, if we're talking about Traditional Catholics. We're not Vulcans (who bury their natural emotions and try to live stoically by pure logic and reason) but when you eliminate the massive connections established by sɛҳuąƖ relations, it has to increase the "market share" or role of Reason in the equation.
I think this is why a man should work quickly to determine if she COULD be "the one", before either of you (or both of you) catch feelings. Don't mess around; go right for the important topics. Look at her family situation, her relationship with her father, her various virtues (or lack thereof), how she was raised, etc.
And if you're afraid to "get serious" in your conversations -- that's a sign she's probably not the one. She probably isn't Trad Catholic wife material. If she's not ready for marriage, just wants to have fun, etc. that's a sign you need to move on immediately.
When courting, aim for activities that allow you to talk and get to know each other -- don't just imitate what worldlings do; they are after something totally different. Going to a place with loud music, etc. is not ideal.
Topic: Break-ups (Read 390 times)