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Author Topic: Apostate close relatives  (Read 1776 times)

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Änσnymσus

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Apostate close relatives
« on: May 16, 2016, 09:35:19 AM »
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    • How should we treat heretics, apostates, and unbelievers if they're close relatives, say, family living in your own home?

    Moving out is not an option.

    Is there a Church teaching somewhere dealing with this type of specific situation? Even something generalized about the treatment towards heretics can be useful. Thanks!
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    Offline TKGS

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    Apostate close relatives
    « Reply #1 on: May 16, 2016, 11:15:34 AM »
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    • Courteously and in the same manner that you would like them to treat you whether they do or not.
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    Änσnymσus

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    Apostate close relatives
    « Reply #2 on: May 16, 2016, 01:22:13 PM »
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    • The Catholic rule is who controls the household.

    If an unrepentant apostate is running the household, you shouldn't live under their roof because you are in spiritual jeopardy.

    I have seen Catholics loose their Faith trying to live in both worlds.
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    Änσnymσus

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    Apostate close relatives
    « Reply #3 on: May 16, 2016, 03:36:43 PM »
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    • It is like having a devil in your home. Why can you not show them the door, even if they are a relative?  If it was  one of our children and old enough to get a job, out they would go!  The whole home is watching how you will handle the situation.
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    Änσnymσus

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    Apostate close relatives
    « Reply #4 on: May 16, 2016, 03:51:02 PM »
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    It is like having a devil in your home. Why can you not show them the door, even if they are a relative?  If it was  one of our children and old enough to get a job, out they would go!  The whole home is watching how you will handle the situation.


    What about if is an aging parent or / and a spouse :facepalm:?
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    Offline Miseremini

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    Apostate close relatives
    « Reply #5 on: May 16, 2016, 05:32:00 PM »
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    • Think of Mary and Joseph in Egypt.  They were surrounded.
    Great trial to practice your faith.....either you convert them (by example only) or they'll move (flee) on their own.
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    "Let God arise, and let His enemies be scattered: and them that hate Him flee from before His Holy Face"  Psalm 67:2[/b]

    Änσnymσus

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    Apostate close relatives
    « Reply #6 on: May 16, 2016, 09:35:01 PM »
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    • Quote from: Guest
    Quote from: Guest
    It is like having a devil in your home. Why can you not show them the door, even if they are a relative?  If it was  one of our children and old enough to get a job, out they would go!  The whole home is watching how you will handle the situation.


    What about if is an aging parent or / and a spouse :facepalm:?


    Yes I'd like to know this as well. Sometimes is not just cut and dry.
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    Offline AMDGJMJ

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    Apostate close relatives
    « Reply #7 on: May 17, 2016, 08:08:04 AM »
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    • Quote from: Guest
    How should we treat heretics, apostates, and unbelievers if they're close relatives, say, family living in your own home?

    Moving out is not an option.

    Is there a Church teaching somewhere dealing with this type of specific situation? Even something generalized about the treatment towards heretics can be useful. Thanks!



    Our Blessed Lord said that we are should love our enemies.  And who more than heretics, apostates, and unbelievers are our enemies?

    We must be kind to them, and win their hearts to God through meekness and humility.

    Saint Monica remained with her pagan husband and cruel mother-in-law, and eventually her meekness won them over to God.

    Saint Clotilde did the same for her husband Clovis, and he and thousands of Franks converted because of her and Saint Remigius.

    The list of examples goes on...

    Yes, we must be careful not to be led astray by heretics, yet unless we are their superiors it is not our place to reprimand them, but rather to try and lead them to God and the Faith through being a courageous and virtuous example to them...

    It is the tenderness of the saints that coverts souls...

    Hope this helps!

    The struggle is tough...  All of my family are novus ordo except for me...

    Keep fighting and may God bless you!
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    "Jesus, Meek and Humble of Heart, make my heart like unto Thine!"

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    Offline poche

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    « Reply #8 on: May 18, 2016, 01:56:35 AM »
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    • Quote from: Guest
    How should we treat heretics, apostates, and unbelievers if they're close relatives, say, family living in your own home?

    Moving out is not an option.

    Is there a Church teaching somewhere dealing with this type of specific situation? Even something generalized about the treatment towards heretics can be useful. Thanks!


    I think the best way to behave is to live the holiness that God calls you to live. Go to mass regularly. Live the Faith. Be open to this person returning to the Faith. Make yourself available to help this person go to confession and mass whenever the situation presents itself.
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    Änσnymσus

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    Apostate close relatives
    « Reply #9 on: May 18, 2016, 07:03:09 AM »
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    • As parents we have a grave duty to our children to protect their blossoming Faith and virtue.  You simply must put this person out of your home OR remove yourself and your children.

    The 1917 Code of Canon law allows for separation of spouses for protecting yourself and children from spiritual harm.

    I've had to remove toxic non-Catholics from my life.  It's sad but necessary.  There's absolutely no reason for non-believers or apostate Catholics to go out of their way to scandalize and mock just for fun.  

    I've spoken to half a dozen priests on breaking off communication with parents.  Sometimes it simply must be done to protect your children.
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    Offline Alexandria

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    Apostate close relatives
    « Reply #10 on: May 18, 2016, 11:46:17 AM »
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    • I wouldn't hesitate for a moment breaking ties with anyone - and I do mean anyone - who was poisoning me or my children in any way regarding faith and morals.

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    Änσnymσus

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    Apostate close relatives
    « Reply #11 on: May 18, 2016, 12:35:22 PM »
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    • If the non Catholic party is the husband, then if the wife leaves him, she would have to go to work full time and probably enroll the children in public school. Not only this, but the husband would have visitation rights at the very least in which the children would be with him alone, unsupervised, without the careful vigilance of the Catholic mother. It is not a black and white situation.

    A better alternative is for her stay put, like St. Monica did, and homeschool the children and raise them as Catholics counting on the financial (and other) support of the husband and being hyper vigilant so the children do not receive a bad example and try much as she can to establish a Catholic home on her own. A separation would occur only if the husband actively endanger or prevent the Catholic raising of the children.
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    Änσnymσus

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    Apostate close relatives
    « Reply #12 on: May 18, 2016, 12:47:09 PM »
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    • Quote from: Guest
    If the non Catholic party is the husband, then if the wife leaves him, she would have to go to work full time and probably enroll the children in public school. Not only this, but the husband would have visitation rights at the very least in which the children would be with him alone, unsupervised, without the careful vigilance of the Catholic mother. It is not a black and white situation.

    A better alternative is for her stay put, like St. Monica did, and homeschool the children and raise them as Catholics counting on the financial (and other) support of the husband and being hyper vigilant so the children do not receive a bad example and try much as she can to establish a Catholic home on her own. A separation would occur only if the husband actively endanger or prevent the Catholic raising of the children.


    I'll add here that I think this is a case where keeping your enemies closer is better. And who knows? maybe the husband will convert one day.
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    Offline AnonymousCatholic

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    Apostate close relatives
    « Reply #13 on: May 18, 2016, 02:03:29 PM »
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    • Quote from: Guest
    How should we treat heretics, apostates, and unbelievers if they're close relatives, say, family living in your own home?

    Moving out is not an option.

    Is there a Church teaching somewhere dealing with this type of specific situation? Even something generalized about the treatment towards heretics can be useful. Thanks!



    I don't think the Church has any teaching that would entirely cover this scenario. But I do know what you're going though and in my experience what works the best is becoming a RADICAL Catholic. A Crucifix in every room, you and your children praying the rosary together daily in a main room and even going to mass more often than necessary. This is a passive way of shoving the faith down their throat and they will either conform or leave. Good luck and Godspeed!
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    Änσnymσus

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    Apostate close relatives
    « Reply #14 on: May 18, 2016, 06:27:39 PM »
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    • Quote from: AnonymousCatholic
    I don't think the Church has any teaching that would entirely cover this scenario. But I do know what you're going though and in my experience what works the best is becoming a RADICAL Catholic. A Crucifix in every room, you and your children praying the rosary together daily in a main room and even going to mass more often than necessary. This is a passive way of shoving the faith down their throat and they will either conform or leave. Good luck and Godspeed!


    Actually this can work.  We did this and got rid of an apostate wayward spouse.  I work at home and homeschool the children so God provided the best solution.  We are very much at peace and can practice our Faith freely without him trying to stop us.
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