That's an important question, ggreg. I'm sure I am to blame. We were ewtn-conservative Catholics, if you know what I mean. Traditional in many things, but, for examples, no headcovering in church, and <gulp> women in pants. She went to a Catholic co-ed university. That's when I noticed small changes beginning. Had I been truly traditional then, I would have 1) not permitted a co-ed university and 2) reigned things in hard and fast while I could. But hindsight, what a guilt trip.
She was working in NYC shortly after graduation, just a few blocks from the towers on Sept 11, and witnessed it all, and herded with the zombied dust covered masses who were trying to exit Manhattan. That experience drove her to the west coast via a promotion. It was all a steady downhill slide from there.
Yes, she is the only family member who very quietly stopped receiving the sacraments. For several years, she pretended she was still practicing; i.e., would attend Mass with the family when she visited, or we visited her, etc., but I found out from her brother that she was not. Then last year she finally admitted the same. So we had what I thought was a straightforward discussion about salvation. No name calling, no anger, but a very serious tone. At the end she said "I just don't feel it anymore".
I've wracked my brain as to why she suddenly feels she must tell me to tone it down. In sincere honesty, I haven't changed at all and this took me by surprise. I believe the farther she moves from Christ, the more painful it is for her to hear anything related to Him. Is it akin to a possession, where an exorcist stirs the demon with the Holy Name?
I'll keep offering rosaries and novenas. It must be working.
Thanks for your feedback.